


eric nyam!~

by suijin



Series: Pretty Setter Squad™ [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: AS SOON AS I SAW MIYA I, Akaashi Keiji Is So Done, B), Chatting & Messaging, Crack, Drag Queen Shirabu Kenjirou, I'm so sorry, Internalized Transphobia, M/M, Polyamory, Pretty Setter Squad, SEMISHIRAAAAA so much semishira it's unreal, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, cringe?????? y Es, didn't wanna rate but just 2 be careful ok, he and oikawa shud be pals irl tbh, i didn't know that was an actual tag byE, i'm pretty sure i was sleep deprived when i wrote this, im not sure if it classifies as that but...., just to be on the safe side!, kags and oiks wanna fite 25/7, kpop references becAUSe just bc, miya's funny like rlly funny, moniwa is actually disgusting here, rated T for swearing lots of swearing sorry i tried holding back but i failed, y'ALL I'VE BEEN WAITING TOO LONG, yahaba just wants to make out with his boyfriend is that too much to ask
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-28
Updated: 2018-01-06
Packaged: 2018-08-11 13:50:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 20,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7895065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/suijin/pseuds/suijin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>monichihuahua: and damn akaashi still looking as pretty as ever</p><p>Akaashi left the chat.</p><p>(Or better known as the Skype chat group for the Pretty Setter Squad™.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. aquiver

**Author's Note:**

> i added moniwa and miya u can fight @ me

**_12:47 PM_ **

 

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** tobio-chan!!!

 **bird boi:** what do you want

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ok rUde

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i heard ur at that national camp training thing hmm

 **semibreve:** he is! ushijima told me that the itachiyama guy told him about it

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl** : semi!!!! my babe!!! i missed u

 **semibreve:** ;)

 **bird boi:** yeah

 **bird boi:** waht about it

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** and i managed 2 hear abt some guy

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** some setter

 **bird boi:** are you bringing this up because you heard he calls me tobio-kun

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** BITH C HOW DID YOU KNOW

 **semibreve:** ya know oikawa sometimes ur really ???? i can’t explain

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** is it hot tho

 **bird boi:** literally bye

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Kageyama! How’s the camp going?

 **bird boi:** suga-san! it’s so much fun here

 **bird boi:** miya’s techniques are so good

 **bird boi:** i don’t think he likes me much though

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** miya????

 **semibreve:** setter guy, babe

 **$ugaDaddy™:** That sucks :(

 **$ugaDaddy™:** We versed Dateko today!!! The team misses you three

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Sorry I gotta go, Daichi’s calling :))) see you guys

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** three???

 **salt central:** him, that tsukishima kid and sunshine boy

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** o

 **semibreve:** shirabu aren't you supposed to be practicing right now

 **salt central:** shit semi’s here

 **salt central:** gotta go bye

 **semibreve:** i,,, ok

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** LMAO shirabu’s avoiding semi its Lit

 **KenKen:** lol

 **KenKen:** suga-san, could you tell shouyou to check his phone?

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Sure, Kenma! Ok I really gotta go now bye guys

 **bird boi:** i gotta go too, my break’s over

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ah one more thing before u go

 **bird boi:** make it quick

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** u should add this miya kid to our cg

 **bird boi:** why….?

 **Akaashi:** Miya Atsumu? I think Bokuto was talking about him before

 **Akaashi:** He said Miya’s sets were really good

 **bird boi:** u know what i’m not going to ask ur probably gonna say something disgusting

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** MEAN

 **bird boi:** wait u alr r disgusting sorry lol

 **pretty babe:** GET FUCKIJG REKT LMAOOO

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** i might not b at practice w u but i can still send ur beloved kyouken ur pictures from first year

 **pretty babe:** i am so sorry

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** yh that’s right yahaba

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** that’s what u GET

 **Akaashi:** Could you guys stop spamming please

 **semibreve:** is this spamming to u OMG oikawa he has no idea

 **Akaashi:** Yes I do I’ve been in this group since the Spring-High prelims

 **semibreve:** hush sonny

 **Akaashi:** Blockedt

 **pretty babe:** did u just

 **Akaashi:** Bye

  
  


**_4:32 PM_ **

  


**bird boi** _added_ **mayo-mayo-kun** _to the chat._

  


**bird boi:** miya-san this is our setter group that oikawa-san made a while back

 **bird boi:** now i’m going to go practice my serves so have fun

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** ok what hello???? yes hello

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** i hav been waiting for u young padawan

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Hi! I’m Sugawara Koushi, Kageyama’s teammate :)

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** you’re the mum of the group aren’t you

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Why

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** oikawa tooru, seijou’s captain and u know wat i like u man

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** thx fam

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** who are u all tho lmao why am i here

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i heard abt u

 **semibreve:** he’s kidding he got mad over u calling kags tobio-kun since he's apparently the only one allowed to call kags by his given name

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** SEMI I TRUSTED U

 **semibreve:** ;)

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** ah tobio-kun

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** tobio-kun learnt from you didn’t he oikawa-san

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** no wonder he plays like that

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Plays like what?

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** like what

 **semibreve:** ??

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** a goody two shoes

 **semibreve:** oh my god

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** bINCH I’LL HAVE U KNOW

 **$ugaDaddy™:** say that abt my son again and i will hunt u down

 **semibreve:** how is it that your gramma changes to that when ur mad

 **Akaashi:** grammar*

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** i like this chat

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** no wonder tobio-kun’s always stuck on his phone!!!!

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** i’m telling iwa-chan to fight u :(

 **semibreve:** o shit waddup

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** here come dat boi

 **semibreve:** O TMG OD

 **salt central:** all of you literally shut the fuck up i’m trying to sleep

 **semibreve:** it’s only 5 wtf

 **salt central:** oh semi

 **salt central:** hey :))

 **salt central:** gonna head back to sleep guys!!

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** my god why are u two like this

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** i’m guessing they wanna fuck but they haven’t yet???

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** i can tell we’re gonna be best friends

 **semibreve:** i’m right here

 **salt central:** uhhhh

 **salt central:** bye!!!

 **$ugaDaddy™:** I think you broke him you guys

 **$ugaDaddy™:** What did I tell you about making fun of others Oikawa

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** and u ask us why we call u mother

 **Akaashi:** Tru

 **semibreve:** i’m still here you guys

 **$ugaDaddy™:** :(

 **pretty babe:** shut the fuck up oh my god

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** oh who’s this

 **pretty babe:** yahaba shigeru, seijou’s other setter

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** ooo you’re pretty

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** hoe don’t do it

 **pretty babe:** thank you!!!! i think my boyfriend agrees!!!!!!

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** SHUT DOWNNNN

 **semibreve:** still here….

 **bird boi:** lmao miya u tried

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** ok :’(.....

 **KenKen:** hi guys i’m home

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** kenma!!! i missed u today where were u

 **KenKen:** i was studying all day since i have an exam tomorrow

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** hi!!! miya atsumu here

 **KenKen:** hi, nekoma’s kozume kenma

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** are we all setters here wrf

 **salt central:** i mean the title does say “pretty setter squad” when are we gonna change jt

 **semibreve:** i thought you were sleeping

 **salt central:** i

 **salt central:** bye

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** OH TNGOD

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** AAAAA

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** AAAAAA

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** AAAAAAAAAAA

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

_[cut for length]_

  


**_8:56 PM_ **

 

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** _sent a picture._

 **$ugaDaddy™:** You guys look like your having fun!

 **Akaashi:** you’re*

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Fuck off lol

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** i’m shOOk MOTHER

 **semibreve:** oh dear oh dear

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** gasp what will father have to say about this

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** HDHAHS NI C E ONE

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** thx fam

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** but HEY have any of u heard can’t help myself

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ERIC NAM??????

 **semibreve:** oh nO

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** oh YE S

 **semibreve:** shit i’m leaving add me later

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** OHHH MY GD I LO VE ERI C SO MUCH HE’S SIO PERF CECT

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** SHI TME TOO I LVOE

  


**semibreve** _has left the chat._

  


**KenKen:** lol he really left

 **KenKen:** i listened to it, it’s good

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** O FC ITS GOOD ITS ERIC NAM

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** is it just me or does he look even hotter now like i cud just EAT him up wow miya chill

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** eric nam more like eric nyam

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** OH Ym FUCKIG OD

 **Akaashi:** Bokuto plays Eric’s songs a lot

 **monichihuahua:** ARE WE TALKING ABOUT ERIC NAM GOD BLESS THIS IS A GOOD END TO THE DAY HMM

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** MONIWAAAAAA WHERE TF WERE U LMAO

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** hey!! aren’t u dateko’s former captain

 **monichihuahua:** yas bitch

 **monichihuahua:** damn who @ u tho mayo-kun

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** miya atsumu!! second year setter

 **monichihuahua:** shit you’re hot

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** i,, thank U???

 **$ugaDaddy™:** why are u like this moniwa I TOLD U NO HITTING ON MY SONS

 **Akaashi:** Semi was right about the grammar thing lmao

 **KenKen:** akaashi, kuroo’s telling me he, bokuto and i are going out and wants you to come with

 **Akaashi:** Right now?

 **KenKen:** yeah we’re at bokuto’s right now

 **Akaashi:** I’ll be there gimme thirty minutes

 **KenKen:** okay

 **monichihuahua:** and damn akaashi still looking as pretty as ever

  


**Akaashi** _left the chat._

  


**mayo-mayo-kun:** LMAOOOOOOO

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** omg

 **$ugaDaddy™:** i told U not to DO THIS MONIWA

 **monichihuahua:** sorry mum

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** is it just me or is everyone in this chat really pretty i

 **bird boi:** just u

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** TOBIO-CHAN FIGHT @ ME

 **bird boi:** lol fucking come @ me boi

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** tobio-kun wanna go practice for a bit

 **bird boi:** see you at gym 3

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** see u guys later

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** see u fam!!

 **pretty babe:** i’m trying to make out with ken and I CANNOT WITH ALL THE GODDAMN SPAM CAN YOU STOP

 **salt central:** angry yahaba strikes again

  


**pretty babe** _left the chat._

  


**salt central** _added_ **semibreve** _,_ **Akaashi** _and_ **pretty babe** _to the chat._

  


**pretty babe:** i don’t appreciate u adding me back in

 **semibreve:** oh my god i missed you fucktards

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i missed u too babe

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** OH OH iwa-chan’s calling gotta blast sorry semi

 **semibreve:** hav fun ;))))))

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ;)))))

 **salt central:** tell him i said hello!

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ofc ofc bye guys

 **semibreve:** hey shirabu

 **salt central:** hey

 **semibreve:** are you busy at the moment

 **salt central:** nah i’m free, what’s up

 **semibreve:** wanna go out for a bit

 **salt central:** sure

 **semibreve:** i’ll be in front of the school

 **salt central:** see you

  


**_11:28 PM_ **

 

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** this conversation drier than my grandma’s pussy

 **$ugaDaddy™:** OH MY GOD

  


**_2:03 AM_ **

 

 **monichihuahua:** what if you had tiny little tongues for arm hair like u can touch people and say hey i just LICKED u

 **monichihuahua:** wrong chat lmao sorry

 **Akaashi:** What the fuck

  


**_4:57 AM_ **

 

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** is no one going 2 pay attention 2 the fact that semi and shirabu were out together??? late at night???? all alone????????

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** !!!!! ;)))))

 **salt central:** is it a problem if we go out

 **semibreve:** we went out for coffee!!

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** at midnight??? ;)))))))))

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ITS DEFINITELY NOT A PROBLEM KEEP IT U P

 **monichihuahua:** sometimes i wish i had a love like that

 **Akaashi:** What the fuck

  



	2. mellifluous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry but just imagine shirabu wearing baby pink thigh highs 
> 
> (SHIRABU WITH THIGH HIGHS I NEED ART FOR THIS RIP)

**_10:32 AM_ **

**monichihuahua:** what if u had dicks for fingers and fingers for dicks like wud u fuck with ur dickfingers or ur fingerdicks???? And like u would have balls for each dickfinger so??? 2x10 balls? 20 balls????

**monichihuahua:** shi t w ron g cha t

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

**semibreve:** T W E N T Y B A L L S

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** i’m starting 2 think ur sending these on purpose

**semibreve:** wait how do u pee

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

**mayo-mayo-kun:** fuck u this kid is giving me the eyes for laughing

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ??? eyes

**semibreve:** hm

**mayo-mayo-kun:** the “u shud feel ashamed for fuckinf ur mother” eyes

**semibreve:** that’s...oddly specific miya

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** don’t judge ppl’s tastes!!!! 

**bird boi:** says the most judgmental guy ever U HYPOCRITE 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** HEY FUCK YOU TOBIO COME BACK HERE SO I CAN FUCK YOUR FACE INTO TOMORROW

**bird boi:** i bet u’d like that wouldn’t u :-)

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** FUCK UP UR FACE****

**$ugaDaddy™:** touch my son again oikawa i fuckin dARE U

**mayo-mayo-kun:** oh my god

**  
  
**

**_3:52 PM_ **

**KenKen:** kageyama could you tell shouyou to answer his phone

**bird boi:** telling him now

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** OOO LITTLE K IDS

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** hey tobio-chan ;))))

**bird boi:** wtf

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** u know i’m in love with u and i reall y really lov eu and i wanna d ate and fuck sometime s and then j feel emo abt u

**bird boi:** are you high again

**mayo-mayo-kun:** what

**monichihuahua:** WTF

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** and i jus t wanna say ur kine the cutes t thing eve rna NFJSISKFBSJ

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** OH MY GOD NO STOP DONT READ THAT THAT WAS ALL MATTSUN AND MAKKI I HA TE THEM

**monichihuahua:** its ok oikawa we know you thirst after kageyama its ok

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** FUCK U

**bird boi:** nothing to b ashamed of, oikawa-san :-)

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** FUCK U x2

**  
  
**

**_4:30 PM_ **

**monichihuahua:** we should call sometime

**mayo-mayo-kun:** HEY thats a good idea!!

**mayo-mayo-kun:** but wen tho lol

**Akaashi:** I’m free whenever? You guys choose

**$ugaDaddy™:** That’s a great idea!! Daichi, Asahi and I are taking out the team for dinner tonight so I should be back by 11

**monichihuahua:** same here 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i hope everyone gets to be here for our first call omg

**bird boi:** if miya-san’s there then we can call together instead of separately

**mayo-mayo-kun:** sure tobio-kun!! just come up to my room and we’ll call lol

**KenKen:** kuroo’s sleeping over so he’ll be there too

**KenKen:** is that okay?

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** KUROO!!!! i haven’t seen his face in AGES OFC ITS OK

**Akaashi:** I have and it’s not pretty

**monichihuahua:** hoLy shIT ruDE OGM

**mayo-mayo-kun:** omg akaashi

**KenKen:** he’s not lying

**$ugaDaddy™:** Akaashi omg

**pretty babe:** y’ALL I

**mayo-mayo-kun:** ??? what

**pretty babe:** i’m blocking ken irl lmaoooo

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** what

**pretty babe:** hE kept staring @ this girl’s ass and i :))))) 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** wow

**Akaashi:** Blockedt

**pretty babe:** AGAIN????

**  
  
**

**_11:27 PM_ **

**$ugaDaddy™:** ya bitch home

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** wtf

**$ugaDaddy™:** CHRIST NO THAT WAS NOYA

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** is everyone getting their phones hacked 2day

**bird boi:** nah just u and suga-san

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** COME HERE AND FITE

**semibreve:** wat did i miss

**salt central:** clearly not much 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** GUYS!!! u were gone the entire day :-(

**semibreve:** YE i went to the training camp that hinata went to and helped them out a bit

**semibreve:** idk abt shirabu tho

**salt central:** i was babysitting my nephew

**semibreve:** you have a nephew??? thAT’S SO CUTE

**salt central:** ok

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** lmaO

**mayo-mayo-kun:** so when r we calling i’m free rn tobio’s in my room too

**Akaashi:** Bokuto’s over too

**$ugaDaddy™:** I’m at home now! 

**KenKen:** let’s call then

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i’m over @ iwa-chan’s rn and he’s working ou t so pl eas e do not lo o k or mention anY thIng

**semibreve:** abt ur thing for iwaizumi’s arms???

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** pl eas e do not lo o k or mention anY thIng

**semibreve:** hmm wat thing i wonder hmmm :))))

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** thx fam let’s do this

**mayo-mayo-kun** _is calling…_

**  
  
**

“Hey losers,” came a drawl from Miya’s screen, and Miya was sitting in front, loose tank top and shorts on, his bangs almost falling across his eyes. Kageyama was sitting beside him, fingers quickly tapping away at his phone. 

Oikawa angled his camera away from Iwaizumi’s (Glorious™) arms as the older man worked out, and sat against the wall on Iwaizumi’s bed. “Hi!”

Semi was in his kitchen, laptop on the counter as he munched on some cereal, “Hey. You look cute, Kenma.”

Kenma, dressed in a skirt and cute shirt, was snuggling against Kuroo who was on his phone. “Thank you,” Kenma shot the tiniest smile at the screen while Oikawa nodded vigorously.

“Tell me where you got that skirt. I need.”

Akaashi was sitting on what seemed like his couch, Bokuto next to him with his arm slung over Akaashi’s shoulders. “Hey, hey, hey!” Bokuto yelled, making Akaashi wince at the loud noise.

Moniwa, sweater loose on his average sized frame, rolled onto his stomach, setting his laptop in front of him. “Where’s Shirabu?”

“I’m here, just didn’t turn my video on,” came Shirabu’s familiar voice.

Sugawara was reading something on his phone, chuckling lightly. “The guys are saying hello. They say they miss you, Kuroo and Bokuto.”

Bokuto whooped, making Kuroo laugh loudly. “Tell them I’m real excited for nationals this year and that I miss them too.”

Yahaba was filing his nails as he merely glanced at the screen. “Yo.”

“Why aren’t you turning your camera on, Shirabu?” Miya asked, placing his palm underneath his chin as he propped his elbow onto the table.

“Yeah,” Oikawa says.

“I, uhm. I’m trying on new clothing,” Shirabu’s voice came out hesitant, making everyone’s eyebrows furrow in confusion.

Oikawa hummed, “Ooh. Let me see.”

“Are you sure?” Shirabu asked, voice meek and clearly nervous as he almost tripped on his words. “I mean. I don’t look that good or anything.”

“Are you kidding?” Semi snorted. “Look, we might have problems but even I’m not that blind. You’re hot. Face it.”

At Semi’s words, unbeknownst to everyone, Shirabu blushed a bright red, fingers tugging at the material.

“Of course we’re sure!” Miya cheers, Moniwa nodding with a cheeky grin.

Kenma spoke up, “I’m wearing a skirt. I’m pretty sure you won’t look that bad. Unless it’s that pink costume that one YouTuber wears.”

“Okay,” Shirabu says, and his camera turns on and everyone’s jaw drops.

Semi promptly choked on his cereal, some of it bursting through his lips as he turned to a side, eyes wide at the sight of a loose cream sweater, almost hanging off the shoulders on Shirabu, paired up with baby pink thigh highs. 

“Holy shit,” Semi wheezed, cheeks pink when he sees Shirabu flush a dark red, bangs falling across his eyes. 

“Are those thigh highs?” Moniwa almost screeched, nearly falling off the bed. 

“They're so cute, Shirabu!” Sugawara grins. 

Kenma looked almost proud, Akaashi nonchalant as ever, Bokuto and Kuroo with their jaws hanging open. 

“Uh. Do I look okay?”

“Okay? You look so fucking good, what the hell,” Miya moaned. “Thigh highs are so fucking hot, like. Just. Bye.”

Oikawa pouted. “I wore thigh highs once and Iwa-chan kicked me. But then we also fucked, so I guess it’s not a problem but--”

“What’s your point?” Tobio raised an eyebrow, adding, “You look nice, Shirabu.”

“My  _ point _ is,” Oikawa glared, “you should wear thigh highs. Right, Semi?”

Semi visibly froze, and all of a sudden his camera clicked, his screen turning black. 

“Did he just leave?” Sugawara asked, eyes blinking. 

Shirabu stilled, fingers tightly gripping the material of his sweater. “Did he not like it or--”

“I’m pretty sure it’s the opposite, sweetheart,” Oikawa gives him a smile. “You worried?”

“N-No, I mean, it’s not like it’s  _ that _ bad, right?” Shirabu let out a nervous laugh, stumbling on his words. 

“He just went offline,” Sugawara looked concerned. “Are you guys still arguing?”

“No,” Shirabu admitted. “After finals, Semi helped me out with some serves. I thought we were doing fine.”

“Aw, look at you,” Oikawa cooed. “So cute.”

A hand shot from behind Oikawa and hit the boy’s head, making him wince. “Oikawa, stop teasing him,” Iwaizumi’s gruff voice filtered through the crackly line and there he was on the screen, sweatpants hanging low on his hips, shirtless and a towel in his hand as he dried his hair. 

“You look good, Shirabu,” Iwaizumi says with a soft smile, making Shirabu blush even harder. 

“Iwaizumi, can you cover yourself, please?” Moniwa says, covering his eyes. “I’m afraid if I see anymore I’ll drool.”

“You’re too late, Miya already is,” Kageyama snickers at the sight of Miya, silent, lips parted as he started at the screen. 

“Iwa-chan!” Oikawa groaned, pushing the camera to a side and hiding Iwaizumi from the group. 

Miya whined almost immediately, “Why would you do that?”

Sugawara just nodded seriously. “Oikawa, you have some problems.”

“Iwaizumi, thanks, by the way,” Shirabu says, letting out an embarrassed laugh and scratched the back of his head. 

A loud knock snapped the group out of their conversation and Moniwa confusedly piped up. “Who’s door was that? Wasn’t mine.”

“I think it was mine, hold on,” Shirabu said, turning around to face the door that was behind him. “It’s open!”

The door slammed open and Shirabu furrowed his eyebrows in puzzlement when he saw Semi storm in. “Semi? What are you doing?”

Semi stomped right in front, stopping in front of Shirabu and next to the laptop. 

“Fuck you,” Semi seethed, glaring down at Shirabu who still looked painfully confused. 

“Semi, what the hell are you talking about?” Shirabu shoots him a look that read what the fuck. 

Semi just snorted. “Shut up, Shirabu.”

“What the  _ hell _ \--”

Whatever words Shirabu wanted to say were long gone because  _ oh Jesus Christ, are those Semi’s lips against mine? _

Semi had leaned down and pressed his lips against Shirabu’s, angling his head so that it was a deep kiss. Shirabu couldn't find it in himself to make him stop, not when Semi let out a low groan. 

There was the sound of whooping in the background (probably just Oikawa, Miya and Moniwa) but Shirabu couldn’t hear it over the sound of his raging heartbeat. 

Semi’s mouth was firmly against his, his large hand cradling Shirabu’s jaw as they kissed. Shirabu could feel Semi smirk into the kiss, and in embarrassment, Shirabu’s hands went up to harshly tug on the older boy’s hair, making him let out a low groan that had Shirabu’s stomach churning. 

Shirabu placed a hand against Semi’s chest, pushing him just the slightest as they looked at each other with droopy eyes. 

“Is this okay?” Semi almost whispered, his eyes flitting to Shirabu’s bed. 

Shirabu blushed, avoiding Semi’s gaze as he nodded. 

Semi gave him a soft smile and that’s when it occurred to him. 

They just made out in front of everyone. 

Semi just laughed while Shirabu let out a humiliated groan when they saw everyone’s shocked (but slightly impressed and knowing) looks.

“Sorry, guys. I’m gonna steal this boy for a while so you have fun.”

The last thing that was heard before Semi cut the call was, “Moniwa, you owe me 30 bucks!”

Semi turned to Shirabu who had an amused look on his face as he spoke, “What was all that about?”

“Shut up,” Semi flushed. “The thigh highs got to me, okay?”

“I may or may not happen to know a lot of other different, strenous activies we could do while I’m wearing these,” Shirabu shot him a suggestive smirk. 

“Why don’t you show me then?” Semi chuckled, grabbing Shirabu by the hand and falling onto the bed, pulling Shirabu until the younger was straddling him. 

“Don’t mind if I do,” Shirabu said, right before swooping down for a kiss.


	3. ineffable

**_3:07 AM_ **

 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** EOJJEONA I JUST HIT THE LOTTO

 

**_4:30 AM_ **

 

**mayo-mayo-kun:** LIPSTICK CHATEAU WAINBIT KEOLLEO!!! 

**monichihuahua:** LA LA LA LA

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** HAYAN CHAMPAGNE BEOBEURE SYAWO

**mayo-mayo-kun:** OH MY GODDDDDD

**monichihuahua:** #$$$$$lotto$$$$$$

**Akaashi:** I’m trying to sl eep can you stop

**Akaashi:** Lotto is good tho

**KenKen:** kuroo plays it all the time

**semibreve:** hey y’all

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** YOU DISAPPEARED EVER SINCE THAT CALL WHERE WERE U

**semibreve:** i was busy lol

**mayo-mayo-kun:** busy screwing shirabu you mean

**monichihuahua:** OHHHHHHHH

**semibreve:** ;)

**salt central:** i don’t see how our sex lives are any of ur business :-)

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** oh my goddddd semishira is reAL

**mayo-mayo-kun:** should i write

**monichihuahua:** D O I T

**mayo-mayo-kun:** but hey did u guys rlly fuck omg

**semibreve:** yas bitch

**salt central:** eita pls

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** HE SAID EITA!!!!!

**monichihuahua:** u guys r so cute stfu

**pretty babe:** hey shirabu i didn’t think u were actually capable of actually getting some :-)

**semibreve:** oh my gOD

**mayo-mayo-kun:** holy shit yahaba wtf

**salt central:** at least i get laid :-))))))))

**semibreve:** FUCK HAHAHHAAHAHA

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** OHHH MY GODDD HSH SHIRABU 

**mayo-mayo-kun:** I’M Gone With The Motherfucking Wind™ 

**KenKen:** lol @ yahaba 

**pretty babe:** bye

**semibreve:** my baby i love u so much my salt central

**semibreve:** wait i got a better name

 

**salt central** _ ’s name has been changed to  _ **savage central** _. _

 

**semibreve:** THERE SHSHA

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** I’M WHESZIGN

**mayo-mayo-kun:** i’ve never seen anything more beautiful

**savage central:** eita’s more beautiful tho

**semibreve:** fuck i’m coming over

**savage central:** the door’s open!!!!

**savage central:** bye guys!!!!

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** how did this even happen

 

**_7:43 AM_ **

 

**$ugaDaddy™:** SEMISHIRA IS ALIVE AND WELL

**$ugaDaddy™:** _sent a picture._

**mayo-mayo-kun:** thank u so much fuck i’m making this my homescreen

**$ugaDaddy™** : No problem fam

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** who are u n what have u done to our mother

**$ugaDaddy™:** Holy shit how did you know it wasn’t Suga

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** ...u said fam

**$ugaDaddy™:** Can’t I be a cool mum

**mayo-mayo-kun:** mum just stop

**$ugaDaddy™:** Fine omg it’s Yamaguchi

**$ugaDaddy™:** Suga-san’s talking to coach so i’m watching his phone!!!!

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** aren’t you that float server

**mayo-mayo-kun:** ???

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** man it was rough handling your balls

**mayo-mayo-kun:** O I K A W A

**Akaashi:** Oikawa, what the fuck

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** NO WAIT

**$ugaDaddy™:** Goodbye :)

**mayo-mayo-kun:** HSHAHAHAH OIKAWA 

**monichihuahua:** i taught u well kiddo 

**pretty babe:** disgusting

**savage central:** like your face? i know :-)

**mayo-mayo-kun:** OH TMG DIDN S SHIRABU

**iwa-chan's bbygirl** : I CAN T NEISJD

**bird boi:** semi did right w changing your name omg

**monichihuahua:** i can’T BR W ATHE

**semibreve:** HDBSJ FU CK COME OVER HERE AND KISS ME I LOVE YOU

**savage central** : i can’t kiss u in front of ushijima wtf control yourself eita

**semibreve:** but kenji :(

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** thEY HAVE NICKNAMES FOR EACH OTHER MIYA

**mayo-mayo-kun:** that’s it i’m writing 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** link me when ur done

**monichihuahua:** i’ll draw bitches

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** can we make the thigh highs a thing :OOOO

**monichihuahua:** …i’m on it

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

 

**_7:49 PM_ **

 

**$ugaDaddy™:** It was a fun match today, guys!!

**$ugaDaddy™:** also oikawa i think we need 2 have a talk don’t u think :-)

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** uhhhh 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** :-)

 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl** _ left the chat.  _

 

**semibreve** _ added  _ **iwa-chan’s bbygirl** _ to the chat.  _

 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** HEY FUCK YOU

 

**_8:36 PM_ **

 

**Akaashi:** Is anyone online?

**mayo-mayo-kun:** i’m here!!!! 

**Akaashi:** Hey

**mayo-mayo-kun:** sup fam

**Akaashi:** I just needed to talk to someone? I guess

**mayo-mayo-kun:** what’s going on?

**Akaashi:** I don’t know where to explain

**mayo-mayo-kun:** from wherever you want akaashi

**Akaashi:** Right

**Akaashi:** Okay so

**mayo-mayo-kun:** ???

**Akaashi:** I think I’m in love with Bokuto

**mayo-mayo-kun:** oh 

**Akaashi:** And I’m screwed because he doesn't like me back or anything

**monichihuahua:** oh sweetheart

**Akaashi:** I mean I guess I saw this coming and I’m not really surprised but it still sucks

**mayo-mayo-kun:** are you sure he doesn't like you at all?

**semibreve:** instead of like

**semibreve:** jumping to conclusions

**semibreve:** how about you talk to him

**semibreve:** bc i know bokuto thru ushijima and i know bokuto’s not the type to let things like this get in the way of ur friendship

**monichihuahua:** ^^ exactly

**Akaashi:** Idk I’m scared? I just don’t wanna get hurt

**semibreve:** everyone gets hurt but that’s okay because not only do you get closure you’ll also feel much better once you get it out

**semibreve:** i felt the same when i told kenji

**Akaashi:** Okay

**Akaashi:** I’ll talk to him tonight

**semibreve:** go out or something

**mayo-mayo-kun:** yeah ^ it’ll do u good to leave the house for once lmao

**Akaashi:** See you guys!

**semibreve:** good luck!!

**monichihuahua:** you can do it!!!

**mayo-mayo-kun:** !!!! i belive @ u

**Akaashi:** Thanks so much

**semibreve:** np np

**mayo-mayo-kun:** the one thing i noticed from this conversation is that semi’s name should be changed

**monichihuahua:** to wat

**semibreve:** ??

 

**semibreve** _ ’s name has been changed to  _ **The Realest Bro™** _. _

 

**The Realest Bro™:** i hate u all

**savage central:** but it’s not a lie babe

**The Realest Bro™:** but kenjiiiii :(

**savage central:** are you free right now

**The Realest Bro™:** yes??? why

**savage central:** my parents aren’t home come over

**The Realest Bro™:** gimme 5 minutes

**mayo-mayo-kun:** you guys are disgusting

**monichihuahua:** f i l t h y

  
  


**_2:03 AM_ **

 

**Akaashi:** I talked to Bokuto

**The Realest Bro™:** ?? how’d it go

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** finally home aaaaa what’s up

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** oh what happened

**monichihuahua:** hey ‘kaashi! 

**mayo-mayo-kun:** y r we all online lmao anyway akaashi what's up 

**Akaashi:** Fuck uh

**Akaashi:** Okay 

**Akaashi:** Wait I need Kenma

**KenKen:** i’m here

**Akaashi:** Could you come over?

**KenKen:** give me 10

**Akaashi:** Thanks

**KenKen:** np, put on a movie i’ll be there soon

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** was it bad?

**The Realest Bro™:** did you and bokuto argue?

**mayo-mayo-kun:** i don’t think so

**monichihuahua:** it just didn’t end the way you hoped it would, huh

**Akaashi:** I’m not really ready to talk about it right now

**Akaashi:** I’m sorry you guys must wanna hear about it and stuff and I’m sorry for letting you down like this and

**$ugaDaddy™:** You should never feel sorry for not feeling comfortable or ready with talking about personal issues! Don’t feel that way, okay? 

**$ugaDaddy™:** You can tell us when you’re ready

**pretty babe:** yeah, we’ll still be around when you wanna talk

**Akaashi:** Kenma’s here

**Akaashi:** I’ll see you later

**The Realest Bro™:** be safe! and dw too much okay

**mayo-mayo-kun:** don't look @ this as somethimg that’ll hold u back okay

**bird boi:** just take some time to think about things

**bird boi:** maybe some space from bokuto-san’s a good idea-- if that's what you want

**bird boi:** and you should always focus on yourself the most yeah

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** damn tobio-chan

**bird boi:** shut up

**mayo-mayo-kun:** damn tobio-kun

**bird boi:** thanks

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** HEY THATS FUCKINg RUDE TOBIO COME HERE AND FUCKING FIGHT

**bird boi:** u know u always say that but ur too scared to actually do it lmaoooo

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** i’m outside karasuno come fite

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** _sent a picture._

**monichihuahua:** why are u outside karasuno 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** ...no reason

**The Realest Bro™:** he’s jk he told me he’s there to steal kageyama’s jersey or smth and i just told iwaizumi he’s going over there right now 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** YOU BITCH

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** HOLY SHIT I ACTUALLY SEE HIM LMAO I’M RUNNING

**bird boi:** d i e

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** OK I THINK I LOST HIM I HUST RA AROUND THE ENTIRE STREET Omg

**The Realest Bro™:** he’s behind u rn isn’t he

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** I HATE U HE’S RIGHT BEHIND ME ANDIFIFE

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** kageyama, i apologise on behalf of shittykawa

**mayo-mayo-kun:** SHITTYKAWA LMAO OIKAWA GET REKT

**bird boi:** he’s not lying :-)

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** i just fought him. he’s on the ground complaining. 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** _sent a picture._

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** also, why is oikawa’s username iwa-chan’s bbygirl?

**The Realest Bro™:** GEE I WONDER

**mayo-mayo-kun:** aren’t u two dating 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** NO WE’RE JUST CHILDHOOD FRIENDS WHY WOULD WE BE DATING

**mayo-mayo-kun:** oh lol sorry chill dude 

**The Realest Bro™:** wow iwaizumi i can’t believe ur denser than the fucking ocean 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** dense? what do i not get?

**bird boi:** oh my god

**mayo-mayo-kun** holy shit

**The Realest Bro™:** i take it back ur denser than osmium bye

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** but i don’t get itdnsnakc

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** HEY FUCKTARDS DON’T DO THIS TO ME

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** GOODBYE

**mayo-mayo-kun:** at least oikawa’s safe now rite

**mayo-mayo-kun:** but da m n oikawa how did you bag that hunk

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** B A C K O F F

**The Realest Bro™:** lmao

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** STFU SEMI U WERE LIKE THIS OVER SHIRABU

 

 **The Realest Bro™** _left the chat._

 

**savage central:** i love him so much he’s grumbling into my shoulder

**savage central:** _ sent a picture.  _

**monichihuahua:** ah young love 

**monichihuahua:** still wish i had a love like that

**Akaashi:** What the fuck


	4. hiraeth

**_9:30 AM_ **

 

 **KenKen:** akaashi’s fine now so dw

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** oh thank god

 **monichihuahua:** i was worried oh bless

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** where is he now

 **KenKen:** he’s asleep rn he just cried a little so he’s a bit tired i guess

 **KenKen:** i’m gonna go home in a bit tho

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** did u talk to bokuto or

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** yeah i’m still a bit worried

 **monichihuahua:** same

 **KenKen:** i asked kuroo to keep an eye out and apparently bokuto came to him crying or smth smth

 **KenKen:** all i can say for now is that it's bad

 **KenKen:** i know it’s shit for each of them

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** ah okay

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** give him a hug and kiss from me!!!! tell him i hope he feels better

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** same!

 **monichihuahua:** hey if we could meet sometime it’d be great

 **monichihuahua:** but nationals :///

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** it’ll be fine

 **KenKen:** i’ll let akaashi know

 **KenKen:** bye guys

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** bye!!!

 **monichihuahua:** when does the intensive training camp end miya

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** tomorrow!!! i’ll be able to go home soon aaaa

 **monichihuahua:** let’s hang out soon!

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** HEY good idea we should

 **monichihuahua:** come to miyagi tho bc most of us are here

 **bird boi:** why do you guys talk so much

 **pretty babe:** ^^

 **$ugaDaddy™:** u guys need to stfu i’m in class you fuckers

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** ...i’m telling father abt this mother :(

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** (wait who’s our father)

 **monichihuahua:** _sent a picture._

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** …

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** i’m telling daddy*** about this mother :(

 **$ugaDaddy™:** LEAVE MY BABY ALONE YOU FUCKERS COME HERE

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** suga why

 **$ugaDaddy™:** DAICHI IS MINE

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** moniwa

 **monichihuahua:** yas babe

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** babe???

 **monichihuahua:** i’m sORRY YOU’RE REALLY CUTE AND I???

 **monichihuahua:** oh my god

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** idk what just happened but thank you kaname-chan ;)))

 **monichihuahua:** BYE

 **$ugaDaddy ™:** Oh my god

 **iwa-chan's bbygirl:** STOP THE GAY™

 **Akaashi:** What the fuck

 

+++

 

**_1:47 PM_ **

 

 **monichihuahua**   _changed the name to_ How To: Crush???

 

 **monichihuahua** _added_ **The Realest Bro™** _,_ **KenKen** _and_ **_bird boi_** _._

 

 **The Realest Bro™:** what’s this

 **bird boi:** what’s w the name

 **monichihuahua:** it’s exactly what it sounds like

 **KenKen:** you like someone and you don't know how to deal

 **KenKen:** i’m right aren't i

 **monichihuahua:** hey fuck u :-)

 **monichihuahua:** but yes e x a c t l y

 **The Realest Bro™:** whaddya need help w

 **The Realest Bro™:** i mean ur like our love guru????

 **monichihuahua:** it's not that it’s a crush??? but i’m like really really attracted??? fuck man

 **The Realest Bro™:** did you talk to futakuchi or aone abt this

 **monichihuahua:** i wud but if they find out who :-) no :-)

 **bird boi:** who is it

 **monichihuahua:** :(

 **KenKen:** ok what do you need help with moniwa-san

 **monichihuahua:** like

 **monichihuahua:** we only met a while back not even that long

 **monichihuahua:** but i’m so attracted it's so fucking weird like

 **monichihuahua:** i mean we talk a lot outside of the gc and stuff so i think i know him the best other than kageyama

 **KenKen:** okay and what do you need us to help with

 **bird boi:** it’s miya isn’t it

 **monichihuahua:** wh a T No WH A T

 **The Realest Bro™:** omg

 **KenKen:** and you need help wITH WHAT OH MY GOD ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION

 **bird boi:** whoa kenma

 **The Realest Bro™:** he finally lost his chill

 **The Realest Bro™:** #screenshotted

 **monichihuahua:** stfu

 **monichihuahua:** anyway like we were talking separately and we have been ever since kags added miya to the chat

 **monichihuahua:** and he told me the camp was ending soon and he wanted to like visit us and stuff

 **monichihuahua:** and i’m really nervous i wanna impress him???? and stuff

 **KenKen:** is he coming when we're hanging out too

 **bird boi:** the setter meetup? i think it's best if we all hang out that day bc it might not go the way u want moniwa-san

 **The Realest Bro™:** ^ yeah and if u want i could tell shirabu to go over and help you out w whatever you need?

 **monichihuahua:** thank u guys so much

 **monichihuahua:** also is it weird i’m interested in miya bc its been like a few days

 **KenKen:** no

 **bird boi:** you’re aware of how you feel--not a crush, like u said--so i think you’ll b fine

 **The Realest Bro™:** its chill

 **The Realest Bro™:** i mean when i saw shirabu i nearly kissed him and then it turned out he was a real brat lmao but i love him :)

 **monichihuahua:** that sounds...really weird but ok

 **monichihuahua:** see u guys later!!!! go study its not lunch yet

 **KenKen:** bye

 **bird boi:** see you

 **The Realest Bro™:** see u later my fucks

 **KenKen:** Blockedt

 **The Realest Bro™:** HEY FUCK YOU

 

+++

 

**_3:04 PM_ **

 

 **$ugaDaddy™** _named the chat_ How To: Deal

 

 **The Realest Bro™:** what’s w ppl and renaming groups into a how to: guide

 **bird boi:** idk

 **$ugaDaddy™:** ??

 **monichihuahua:** nothing

 **monichihuahua:** what's up anyway

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Johzenji’s over for a practice match and we're just about to start

 **$ugaDaddy™:** I want to spike the ball into Terushima’s face and make him cry tears of BLOOD

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** w hOa suga chill what’s going on

 **monichihuahua:** atsumu!!! i missed u :(

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** missed u more kaname!!!!  <33

**The Realest Bro™:**

**monichihuahua:** s h u t

 **The Realest Bro™:** i didn’t say anything????

 **monichihuahua:** s h u t x2

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** wat

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** anyway suga tell us

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Terushima knows I like Daichi and he told me they hooked up last weekend

 **bird boi:** fuck

 **bird boi:** seriously?

 **The Realest Bro™:** what did you say

 **$ugaDaddy™:** ...I may have asked how good he was and Terushima kept bragging

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ??? and

 **$ugaDaddy™:** ...And I may have said something along the lines of “oh lol i had better”

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** suga u didn’t

 **The Realest Bro™:** ??? WHO

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** ...i feel like i’m supposed to know who this is

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** SUGA U TOTALLY DID

 **$ugaDaddy™:** IM SORRY IT JUST CAME OUT BC EVERYONE KNOWS JUST HOW MUCH OF A SLUT TERUSHIMA IS FOR YOU OKAY

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** if iwa-chan hears abt this oh my god

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** YOU GUYS FUCKED WTF THAT’S SO HOT

 **monichihuahua:** THATS SO HOT

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** OH MY GOD HSHAH KANAME SAME

 **monichihuahua:** tru love  <333

 **The Realest Bro™:** I DONT KNOW YOU ANYMORE

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** but hey isn’t it awkward for you??? Lol

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** nah we fucked a lot but it’s chill??? ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Like we hooked up for fun??? We liked other people though

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** but hey suga u weren’t lying when u said u had bette

 **The Realest Bro™:** bette

 **monichihuahua:** atsumu i want our love to b like that

 **mayo-mayo-kun** : kaname are u busy

 **monichihuahua:** no y

 **mayo-mayo-kun:** i’m calling u

 **monichihuahua:** ok

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** BUT HEY WHAT DID TERUSHIMA SAY

 **$ugaDaddy™:** OH MY GOD HE WAS F U R I O U S

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i taught u rite mr. refreshing

 **$ugaDaddy™:** if u call me that one more time i swear

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** what??? ;)

 **$ugaDaddy™:** I mean I was coming over so you could fuck me but I guess never mind :)

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** YOU CRUEL CRUEL MAN

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** (the door’s open)

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Control your damn thirst Oikawa

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** I HAVENT GOTTEN LAID SINCE THE TIME WE HAD HATE SEX AFTER WE LOST TO YOU OKAY DONT FUCKING JUDGE

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Oh my god Daichi kept asking why I was limping the day after I hate you do you know how many fucking bruises I had

 **bird boi:** i can never unsee this

 **$ugaDaddy™:** OH GOD I FORGOT YOU WERE IN THIS CHAT

 **bird boi:** i need to bleach my eyes

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** what??? don’t like the visual of me fucking ur mother HUH SUCK IT TOBIO

 **$ugaDaddy™:** I’m not coming over anymore

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** fine see if i care

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** (the door is still open)

 

 **bird boi** _left the chat._

 

 **$ugaDaddy™:** SON I AM SO SORRY

 

 **The Realest Bro™** _added_ **bird boi** _to the chat._

 

 **bird boi:** fuck now i can’t get the picture out of my head

 **pretty babe:** oikawa-senpai i can never look at you the same again

 **Akaashi:** What the fuck

  



	5. nefarious

**_4:20 AM_ **

**mayo-mayo-kun:** ITS TIME

**monichihuahua:** lol blaze

**mayo-mayo-kun:** fuck i love u

**monichihuahua:** _sent a picture._

**mayo-mayo-kun:** IS THAT A JOINT KANAME 

**monichihuahua:** sasaya and kamasaki may have convinced me and shitttt this is good

**mayo-mayo-kun:** send me a pic of u smoking

**monichihuahua:** _sent a picture._

**mayo-mayo-kun:** fuck that’s so hot

**monichihuahua:** thanks babe

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** _sent a picture._

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** look at my best friend!!!!

**mayo-mayo-kun:** jes u s christ what did u do to him

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** _sent a picture._

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** more like what did he do to me

**monichihuahua:** oh my god

**bird boi:** stop sending me pictures of my mother and you after you had sex i do not need to know t h i s

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** ur just jealous ur not getting any :))))

**The Realest Bro™:** oikawa u do know that he n shrimpy have been dating/fucking since they lost to u in that inter high ages ago rite…

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** ...

**bird boi:** so what was that???? abt me being jealous i’m not getting any??? :)))) 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** its too fucking early in the morning for this fucking leave me alone tobio 

**The Realest Bro™:** lmao @ oikawa

**bird boi:** _sent a picture._

**monichihuahua:** MY SON TELL HIM I SAID HELLO HI I MISS HIM A LOT

**bird boi:** hinata said hello

**mayo-mayo-kun:** HE’S SO SMOL

**monichihuahua:** i’m smol too

**mayo-mayo-kun:** i know kaname ur the smolest ur the cutest 

**monichihuahua:** <333

**mayo-mayo-kun:** anyway tobio-kun i’m assuming u had a safe trip

**bird boi:** yeah!!! i gotta go now bc hinata keeps poking me

**bird boi:** _sent a picture._

**bird boi:** he’s mad i’m not paying attention to him lmao

**savage central:** my s o n hinata i miss u hi

**The Realest Bro™:** KENJI!!!! 

**savage central:** eita!!!! imu

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** who here is even in a relationship

**bird boi:** me lol

**The Realest Bro™:** kenji n i are dating

**KenKen:** kuroo and i are

**monichihuahua:** single n ready to mingle ;)))

**mayo-mayo-kun:** does that mean i can flirt w u kaname-chan

**monichihuahua:** from the way we were speaking i assumed we alr were ;))

**mayo-mayo-kun:** i’m calling u hold on

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** and i’m still stuck single h o w

**$ugaDaddy™:** Shut up and let me sleep Oikawa come here and fucking cuddle me you bitch

**$ugaDaddy™:** Or no more sex for you 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** nO I’M COMING WAIT

**pretty babe:** disgusting

**savage central:** yh i know u r,, u don’t have to tell us trust me we are 100% aware

**pretty babe:** BITCH

**The Realest Bro™:** i love kenji so much

**savage central:** stop ur going to give me a heart boner ;)))

**The Realest Bro™:** i already have one ;)))

**savage central:** can we sneak in a fuck before class

**The Realest Bro™:** i’m coming over ok leave the window open 

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

**_1:56 PM_ **

**bird boi:** the one guy i didn’t miss while i was gone

**bird boi:** _sent a picture._

**The Realest Bro™:** GOD HE FRUSTRATED ME SO MUCH DURIJG OUR MATCH AT FINALS

**savage central:** that kid

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** MEGANE-CHAN!!!! 

**$ugaDaddy™:** Oikawa I told you no hickeys on mY FUCKING NECK PEOPLE NOTICED YOU ASSHOLE

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i’m not sorry ;))))

**$ugaDaddy™:** Oh god Daichi asked me who I hooked up w and I said it was you and you know that scary smile he has on when nobody listens to him right 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** god that sends chills down my spine fuck

**$ugaDaddy™:** HE WAS SMILING AT ME AND SAID “ha...oikawa..huh”

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** its not our faults our best friends don’t realise we like them!!!! 

**$ugaDaddy™:** AND HE TOLD ME I CAN’T HOOK UP W YOU??? I’m LIKE UH BJTCH U FUCKED TERUSHIMA BYE LMAO

**bird boi:** i can’t do this anymkre bye

**The Realest Bro™:** (i think you broke him)

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** ??? WHY TF

**$ugaDaddy™:** LIKE HE HAS NO RIGHT TELLIJG ME WHO I CAN AND CAN’T FUCK RIGHT WE’RE NKT EVEN DATING!!!!

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** hm...i have an idea that i think u will like

**$ugaDaddy™:** What’s that

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** when do you finish school today i’ll come pick you up

**$ugaDaddy™:** OIKAWA THATS GENIUS FUCK COME PICK ME UP AT 4 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** don’t u have vball practice???

**$ugaDaddy™:** I’ll tell Coach you’re giving some pointers on serving/setting or something

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** what if you go to practice, but i come watch? n help you or or smth smth

**$ugaDaddy™:** We could practice outside 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** alrighttt text me when your class ends so i can come on time

**$ugaDaddy™:** Got it 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** now go study iwa-chan’s calling me lol

**The Realest Bro™:** why are u guys like This™

**_3:56 PM_ **

**$ugaDaddy™:** Oikawa I’m done w class

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i’m almost there 

**$ugaDaddy™:** Were you waiting near my school omg

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i just went out to get u a gift bc i wanna piss daichi off lol jackass

**$ugaDaddy™:** Ugh Daichi keeps telling me to not slack off??? Since when did I 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** dw ur saviour is at the gate come get me

**pretty babe:** my god oikawa

**monichihuahua:** i await the gossip when ur done

**mayo-mayo-kun:** pls share the salt ok

**mayo-mayo-kun:** KANAME!!!

**monichihuahua:** hi atsumu

**mayo-mayo-kun:** r u okay :(

**monichihuahua:** just a bad day :(

**mayo-mayo-kun:** let’s vid call!! just the two of us

**monichihuahua:** alrite wait

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** suga where r u

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** nvm i see u lol wait

**  
**  


“Koushi!” Oikawa’s familiar voice rang through the busy gateway of Karasuno. Sugawara lightly jogged up to Oikawa, ignoring the excited looks on the girls’ faces and the hushed murmurs of, “Is that Oikawa Tooru? From Aoba Johsai?”

“Tooru! I missed you,” Sugawara pouts, leaning into Oikawa’s embrace when the boy opens his arm wide. The older boy ruffled Oikawa’s hair, pulling him inside. 

“So, where’s your lover boy?” Oikawa snorts when they near the gym.

Sugawara rolled his eyes, pointing at the gym door. “He’s inside. I told Coach you were coming and he’s fine with it as long as I’m prepared for tomorrow’s match.”

“Tomorrow’s match?” Oikawa rolls the sleeves of his shirt up, fixing it above his elbows, looking at Sugawara just as the smaller boy placed his hand against the door to push it open.

“Dateko,” Sugawara says, forcefully pushing it.

The noises inside died down once the two of them entered, Oikawa lingering behind Sugawara.

Ukai jogs over, an awkward smile on his face. “Oikawa. Nice to meet you. I didn’t know you and Suga were friends.”

“Koushi and I’ve been friends for ages,” Oikawa laughs. 

“Koushi?” 

The trio turn around to see Sawamura with a blank face and a raised eyebrow.

“Tooru and I are pretty close,” Sugawara shoots him an innocent smile, elbowing Oikawa in the stomach as if to say  _ play nice. _

“I’m not sure if I can serve in here, so is it alright if I take Koushi right outside to help him out?” Oikawa smoothly transitioned the topic and Sugawara let out a sigh of relief.

Ukai nodded thoughtfully. “Sure. But Suga, make sure to come back in before you leave. We have a meeting.”

Sugawara just nodded, choosing to turn around to Oikawa with an expectant look on his face.

Oikawa just chuckles, sliding his arm around Sugawara’s waist and pulling him close, making sure Sawamura could see Oikawa’s lips against Sugawara’s ear. “He’s staring, sweetheart.”

“I knew I made the right decision when I asked you to play along with me,” Sugawara let out a breathy sigh, tugging Oikawa outside, ignoring the looks his teammates--excluding Kageyama, who just looked traumatised-- were giving him through the window.

The practice went with Oikawa actually giving Sugawara some tips, helping him out with his posture, avoiding Sawamura’s pointed staring, further angering the man by giving Sugawara a kiss whenever he got something right.

And it wasn’t just a small kiss. 

They had to stop themselves before they ended up fucking against a tree with everyone to see.

It was three hours later that practice ended, and Sugawara had come out of the meeting only to see Oikawa waiting outside, but with two new people.

“You fucktards should have told us you were meeting,” Semi shot Sugawara a look.

Shirabu just laughed. “Babe, chill. Come on, we’re treating you both to dinner.”

Oikawa’s arm almost automatically went to grip Sugawara’s waist when the Karasuno team exited the school. 

“Hi, Tobio-chan, shrimpy,” Oikawa sent them a smile that basically screamed malicious intent.

They awkwardly nodded and turned away to Tanaka and Nishinoya who looked like they were guarding the first years. Azumane and Shimizu were talking to Yachi, the other second years talking amongst themselves and Sawamura standing there alone.

“Suga!” Sawamura called out, shooting Oikawa a look that read hands-off-my-man. “I thought you were coming to get meat buns with us.”

“Sorry, but I’m stealing this boy on a date tonight,” Oikawa smiled smugly, pulling Sugawara in until the older boy was flush against Oikawa’s chest. “You can have him tomorrow.”

“Let’s go,” Semi said, his hand gripping Shirabu’s.

Shirabu, clearly picking up the tension between Sugawara, Sawamura and Oikawa, just sent them a desperate look. “Come on. Hurry up.”

“Sorry, Daichi,” Sugawara shot him a sympathetic look. “I’ll see you later.”

**  
**  


**_11:37 PM_ **

**$ugaDaddy™:** I feel bad

**bird boi:** there’s nothing for you to feel bad about suga-san

**$ugaDaddy™:** Are you sure?

**bird boi:** i’m completely sure

**bird boi:** now rest

**$ugaDaddy™:** Okay

**_5:53 AM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** GOOD LUCK ON YOUR MATCH WITH DATEKO!!!! I LOVE YOU

**monichihuahua:** i’m coming to visit today if oikawa and the shiratorizawa couple r

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i’ll go!!!

**The Realest Bro™:** shirabu and i’ll come

**pretty babe:** same

**mayo-mayo-kun:** kaname why would u do this :(

**monichihuahua:** i’m sorry baby we can meet when u visit okay

**mayo-mayo-kun:** :(

**monichihuahua:** i’ll give u lots of hugs!!!!!!

**mayo-mayo-kun:** what about kisses :((

**monichihuahua:** yes i’ll give u lots of kisses too

**mayo-mayo-kun:** u better :(((

+++

How To: Crush???:

**monichihuahua** _changed the name to_ How To: Die????

**monichihuahua:** fuck i’m so Emo™

**The Realest Bro™:** just meet up and make out with him already jesus fuck


	6. somnanbulist

**_07:45 AM_ **

**$ugaDaddy™:** I think Daichi’s mad at me

**mayo-mayo-kun:** what’s wrong 

**$ugaDaddy™:** He wasn’t at our normal meet up point so I’m walking alone rn

**mayo-mayo-kun:** do you think it’s because 

oikawa’s been going to your practices recently

**monichihuahua:** that’s probably it

**mayo-mayo-kun:** sweetpea <3

**monichihuahua:** pumpkin <3

**The Realest Bro™:** i’m,,, disgusted,,,

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** literally stfu 

**_3:35 PM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** koushi i’m not coming today

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** not coming at all actually anymore?? i think

**$ugaDaddy™:** W h y

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** details will b given later but there is a shirtless man in my room giving me the eyes i gotta g o

**$ugaDaddy™:** OIKAWA SERIOUSLY YOU’RE GETTING LAID AT THIS TIME OF DAY

**mayo-mayo-kun:** ?

pretty babe: oikawa’s skipping practice to get freaky w iwaizumi 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** FUCK YOU YAHABA

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** at least i’m not the one who sucked my boyfriend’s dick in the storage closet

**The Realest Bro™:** OH MY GOD YAHABA HHAAAHAHS

**pretty babe:** bye

**bird boi:** the roast is real

**KenKen:** roast game strong

**monichihuahua:** DAMN OIKAWA GET SOME

**mayo-mayo-kun:** i wanna see :’(

**monichihuahua:** yh babe send pics or it never happened

**Akaashi:** How disgusting can you both get

**The Realest Bro™:** do u now see why they’re perfect for each other 

**savage central:** @ moniwa n miya u should just date

**monichihuahua:** i

**mayo-mayo-kun:** we alr are ;)))

**monichihuahua:** !! ;)))

**monichihuahua:** i gotta go see u fukrs later

**The Realest Bro™:** did he just

**mayo-mayo-kun:** ???

**bird boi:** really moniwa

**KenKen:** i believe he did

**$ugaDaddy™:** Still need help here!!!!

**monichihuahua:** i’ll tell futakuchi to make out w you after the match or smth

**$ugaDaddy™:** Moniwa I love you you’re an actual life saver

**mayo-mayo-kun:** babe i thought u alr left

**monichihuahua:** bye ;)))

**bird boi:** what even are you

**mayo-mayo-kun:** my boyfriend

**monichihuahua:** OH MY GOD

**Akaashi:** Triggeredt

**pretty babe:** what the fuck

**The Realest Bro™:** never thought i’d see the day where someone says wtf @ akaashi

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

**The Realest Bro™:** spoke too soon then

**_4:54 PM_ **

**$ugaDaddy™:** Tooru why 

**monichihuahua:** ???

**$ugaDaddy™:** He posted a pic of a naked guy beside him on his snap story

**monichihuahua:** oh my god

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** OK IWA-CHAN LOOKED SO GO O D YOUCANT BLAME ME

**mayo-mayo-kun:** can i see??

**$ugaDaddy™:** _sent a picture._

**mayo-mayo-kun:** d a d d y

**monichihuahua:** omg

**$ugaDaddy™:** I swear to fuck

**_8:37 PM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl** _ added  _ **watch him rollin watch him go** _ and  _ **he be rollin down the street** _ to the chat.  _

**watch him rollin watch him go:** hey my babes

**he be rollin down the street:** oikawa’s not here hi guys

**mayo-mayo-kun:** who are you

**watch him rollin watch him go:** dat boi

**he be rollin down the street:** fuck hiro i love u

**monichihuahua:** o h  n o

**The Realest Bro™:** i knew it was a matter of time before u fuckers showed up again omg i missed u

**watch him rollin watch him go:** is it bad that i don’t even have to try n figure out who u are semi

**he be rollin down the street:** moNIWA HI YES

**monichihuahua:** MATTSUNNNNN MY BITCH

**monichihuahua:** HANAMAKI I MISSED U HOE <33

**watch him rollin watch him go:** babe <3

**mayo-mayo-kun:** ????

**watch him rollin watch him go:** o who’s this

**mayo-mayo-kun:** miya atsumu!!! second year setter wbu

**he be rollin down the street:** SO UR THE MIYA THAT OIKAWA KEEPS TALKING ABT RITE RITE

**mayo-mayo-kun:** ?

**monichihuahua:** omg

**watch him rollin watch him go:** probably my dude

**he be rollin down the street:** you called me dude <3 

**watch him rollin watch him go:** <3

**watch him rollin watch him go:** ok but anyway we added ourselves thru oikawa’s phone bc he’s showering n iwaizumi is out getting groceries or whatever

**watch him rollin watch him go:** sorry suga but he has just had sex w iwaizumi (its hard to not notice w all that bruising n hickies tbh but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯) so i’m guessing they’re together now

**he be rollin down the street:** wHAT BRUISES THE GUY LOOKS FUCKING WRECKED LMAOOO

**$ugaDaddy™:** It's okay

**$ugaDaddy ™:** Futakuchi’s better at making out anyway! :) 

**monichihuahua:** OH MY GOD

**mayo-mayo-kun:** what is wrong w our gc oh god

**The Realest Bro™:** are you really asking this now 

**he be rollin down the street:** anyway we just wanted to let u know since we r good bros

**watch him rollin watch him go:** shit mattsun i heard the bathroom door open we gotta go

**he be rollin down the street:** oh my god ok

**watch him rollin watch him go** _ left the chat.  _

**he be rollin down the street** _ left the chat.  _

**mayo-mayo-kun:** ...so now what

**The Realest Bro™:** idk

**_9:24 PM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** THOSE FUCKERS

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ALSO @ SUGA FITE ME

**_11:35 PM_ **

**$ugaDaddy™:** Moniwa you can tell Futakuchi everything’s fine now

**monichihuahua:** ?

**$ugaDaddy™:** Daichi asked me out lol

**mayo-mayo-kun:** w Ha t

**$ugaDaddy™:** He accidentally told me he liked me and ?? we're going on a date this weekend

**The Realest Bro™:** how is everyone suddenly getting into relationships????

**bird boi:** fuck if i know lol

**The Realest Bro™:** you're in a relationship stfu

**bird boi:** ??? u too??? tf

**Akaashi:** Bokuto-san and I are together now

**Akaashi:** We talked

**mayo-mayo-kun:** Jesus Fuck

**mayo-mayo-kun:** (aLSO YAY CONGRATS)

**monichihuahua:** atsumu i think we’re the only single ones here

**mayo-mayo-kun:** Jesus Fuck

**monichihuahua:** well i mean i did get asked out on a date recently but i’ve been trying to find an excuse to not go???

**mayo-mayo-kun:** aw y

monichihuahua: idk doesn't feel right

**mayo-mayo-kun:** hm

**mayo-mayo-kun:** tell them you're with someone?

**monichihuahua:** yeah and who am i supposed to offer up as bait  >.>

**mayo-mayo-kun:** uhhhh lemme see

**mayo-mayo-kun:** AH

**monichihuahua:** ?

**mayo-mayo-kun:** tell them we're dating

**monichihuahua:** WHAT

**mayo-mayo-kun:** idk you don't have to!!! 

**mayo-mayo-kun:** you can say you like someone and u don't wanna hurt them or whatever

**monichihuahua:** yeah

**monichihuahua:** i’ll go ahead and do that rn

**mayo-mayo-kun:** cool

**  
**  


**_02:34 AM_ **

**pretty babe:** why is this conversation dead

**savage central:** because ur desd to me

**pretty babe:** ...that would have been thirty times more threatening if you spelled dead correctly

**savage central:** no one asked u

**$ugaDaddy™:** can u all fucking sleep oh my fucking god

**Akaashi:** What the fuck


	7. epoch

**_5:35 AM_ **

**mayo-mayo-kun:** u know i just realised p.i.m.p has really sad lyrics

**Akaashi:** Did you really have to wake me up for this

**monichihuahua:** u can never go wrong w 50 cent

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

**1:27 PM**

**KenKen:** akaashi

**Akaashi:** ?

**KenKen:** kuro told me to tell you that he wants us four to hang out

**Akaashi:** Bokuto and I are on our way to yours

**KenKen:** okay

**The Realest Bro™:** ah speaking of bokuto what happened between you guys anyway

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** tru

**Akaashi:** When I confessed it wasn’t that he didn’t like me back

**Akaashi:** He did a lot in fact

**bird boi:** ? so

**Akaashi:** Well

**Akaashi:** We ended up arguing instead because Bokuto felt like he wasn’t good enough for me and it got bad he ended up running away

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** WHAT

**The Realest Bro™:** HE FELT LIKE HE WASN’T GOOD ENOUGH WTF

**savage central:** he’s more than enough?????

**Akaashi:** I told him that and it didn’t turn out good

**Akaashi:** But we talked it out

**Akaashi:** He’s my boyfriend now :)

**mayo-mayo-kun:** u just send a smiley the world is ending

**monichihuahua:** damn akaashi 

**The Realest Bro™:** moniwA NO

**monichihuahua:** when u smile my heart goes badump fuck

**Akaashi** _ has left the chat. _

**$ugaDaddy™:** MONIWA FUCKING COME HERE

**mayo-mayo-kun:** LMAOOOOOO

**The Realest Bro™:** i told u

**pretty babe:** why is this chat such a trainwreck

**savage central:** why are u such a trainwreck

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** HSHAHHSA

**The Realest Bro™:** babe<3

**savage central:** babe <3

**The Realest Bro™** _’s name has been changed to_ **STOP THE GAY** _._

**mayo-mayo-kun:** OH MY GODDDDD WHO DID THIS

**STOP THE GAY:** well i mean it ain’t a lie

**savage central:** bye

**STOP THE GAY:** LITERALLY WTF KENJI UR GAY

**savage central:** ;)))

**STOP THE GAY:** is that code for

**savage central:** yes

**STOP THE GAY:** give me five mins

**monichihuahua:** oh my god

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** u nasty asseS JESUS CHRIST

**bird boi:** i changed the name

**bird boi:** quite fitting

**STOP THE GAY:** thanks babe you just got me an extra fuck ;)

**bird boi** _left the chat._

**pretty babe:** why is this chat still a trainwreck

**savage central:** why are you still here

**monichihuahua** _added_ **Akaashi** _and_ **bird boi** _to the chat._

**monichihuahua:** y’all got some issues lmao

**mayo-mayo-kun:** KANAME HEY GUESS WHA T

**monichihuahua:** ?

**savage central:** you finally realised you’re actually moniwa’s hoe?

**monichihuahua:** OH MY GOD

**mayo-mayo-kun:** close but no

**monichihuahua:** OH MY GOD x2

**mayo-mayo-kun** _’s name has been changed to_ **Moniwa’s Hoe** _._

**monichihuahua:** w hY

**monichihuahua** _’s name has been changed to_ **Miya’s Slut** _._

**Miya’s Slut:** I HATE ALL OF YOU

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** HSHSAHA BUT BABE

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** BABE

**STOP THE GAY:** AND YOU TELL ME IM NAST Y

**savage central:** eita where are you this is getting uncomfortable

**KenKen:** what

**STOP THE GAY:** are you wearing the

**savage central:** ...maybe

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i don’t even wanna know man just leave

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** send pix

**Miya’s Slut:** ^^

**STOP THE GAY:** instead of MY boyfriend sending u hot pics

**STOP THE GAY:** why don’t u send each other pics if ur so thirsty damn

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** semi this is the best idea you have ever had so far

**Miya’s Slut:** i,, bye

**STOP THE GAY:** ur wc mayo boi

**STOP THE GAY:** now i’m going to go screw my boyfriend thank you

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

**_10:34 PM_ **

**Miya’s Slut:** yh but atsumu what was it that u wanted to tell me

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** YES RIGHT BACK ON TRACK

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** I GET THE WEEKEND OFF NO VBALL PRACTICE FY

**Miya’s Slut:** ??? but u like vball wyd

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** and i may have bought myself

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** a ticket to miyagi for this saturday morning and stay there this entire weekend

**Miya’s Slut:** WHAT

**Miya’s Slut:** ATSUMU ARE YOU KIDDING NO I SWEAR IF UR JOKING

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i was wondering if i could stay at yours

**Miya’s Slut:** OF COUR SE WHA T THE FUCK ATSUMU CALL ME

**Akaashi:** I’m not really sure what just happened

**Akaashi:** But same

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ayy bbg comin to the crib !

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

+++

Conversation with atsumu:

**kaname:** hi yes

**kaname:** i’d rather call in private if u don’t mind i’m screm rn

**atsumu:** same babe

**atsumu:** calling! 

**atsumu** _ is calling… _

“Hi, Kaname,” Miya’s voice had that familiar drawl to it that made Moniwa’s fingers clench around the hem of his shirt. Miya had kept his hair gel-free today, a pair of glasses sitting on his noses, loose sweater on him, the innocent look contrasting with the industrial piercing in his ear.

“Atsumu!” Moniwa nearly shrieked. “Are you really coming here?”

“Of course I am,” Miya laughs, a sound that has Moniwa’s stomach churning. “This might be my only chance to meet you before nationals and I just… really wanted to see you.”

_ Fuck.  _

_ I hate him so much. _

“I want to see you too,” Moniwa breathes out, cheeks flushing, prominent against his pale skin. “You can stay at my place, I have a guest room and everything.”

“A guest room? Do you live alone?” Miya asked, but the evident concern in his voice only made Moniwa blush harder. 

_ Why is he always so goddamn caring, dammit. _

“I  _ am  _ eighteen now,” Moniwa says like it’s supposed to be obvious but then continues in a teasing voice. “It made smoking joints so much easier.”

“Does this mean I get to see you smoking?” Miya raised an eyebrow, lips curving into that beautiful smirk that has Moniwa weak at his knees.

“That means you get to smoke  _ with  _ me,” Moniwa waggles his eyebrows but then hides his face, peeking at Miya. “But. You’re visiting. In five days. I’m not okay.”

“Same, babe, same.”

The nickname made Moniwa let out a groan. Miya laughs, making Moniwa pout. “What?”

“It’s hilarious how whenever we make comments in the group chat you’re all Sex God but when we’re alone you’re this stuttering mess,” Miya snorts.

“I came here to have a good time and I honestly feel so attacked right now,” Moniwa immediately says, mentally cursing himself and his knee jerk reaction to respond to compliments with memes.

“That meme is as outdated as Oikawa’s sense of fashion.”

It shouldn’t have, but that statement had Moniwa laughing so hard the neighbours ended up knocking on his door.

It was nearing four in the morning when Moniwa let out a yawn, eyes half closed, and Miya’s voice woke him up.

“Shouldn’t you go to sleep now? You have school tomorrow, you know,” Miya says.

“Sing me to sleep, you fucker,” Moniwa replies, his brain-to-mouth filter clearly not working as sleep slowly took over him.

“Anything for you, babe,” Miya laughs softly.

Miya’s soothing voice lulled him to sleep, body calming down between Miya singing something along the lines of _ Baby, I’m yours, and I’ll be yours until the stars fall from the sky _ and Miya murmuring to him softly, “Goodnight, Kaname.”


	8. sonorous

**_5:52 AM_ **

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** kaname are u awake

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** he’s ded

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** WHAT

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** we took him out drinking with sasaya and kamasaki and he’s sleeping lol i’m at his place rn w semi

**STOP THE GAY:** yh my head hurtd

**STOP THE GAY:** i can teven rad fuck my screnr is so blrury

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** the only thing u spelled right is fuck

**STOP THE GAY:** o well ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** stop acting drunk semi jesus fuck

**STOP THE GAY:** bitch

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** anYWAY

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i need ur help

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** what’s up my guy

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i’m in the train rn to miyagi

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** OH MY GOD

**STOP THE GAY:** WHAT REALLY

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** YES I AM 

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** and i was hoping one of u could pick me up lol i’ll be there in like ten mins

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i’ll come pick you up dw

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** and semi plea se look after moniwa while i’m gone

**STOP THE GAY:** dw babe ;)

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** alrite i’ll see u at the station then

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** make sure kaname doesn’t see these msgs until i’m there ok its a surprise he thinks i’m coming at 10

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** sure but on one condition

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** should i b worried

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** we’re leaving after u get here so u watch over him

**STOP THE GAY:** i need sleep i’m so tired

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** we both are i feel dead

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** is drinking w kaname that tiring

**STOP THE GAY:** it gets so wild y’all don’t even know

**STOP THE GAY:** (it’s funny bc u really don’t)

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** semi i can hear you cackling stop

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** how wild does it usually get

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** what kind of wild do u mean

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** ???

**STOP THE GAY:** tru @ oikawa

**STOP THE GAY:** he’s either rlly hyper or rlly horny there’s no in between

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** which one was he tonight

**STOP THE GAY:** the latter ;)

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** oikawa come pick me up

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** omw

**_6:07 AM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** miya i’m waiting out

Miya took in a deep breath and walked through the exit, eyes laying on a tall boy leaning against a car.

“Oikawa?” He called out and the boy started waving. 

Miya jogged over, his grip on his bag tightening in nervousness.

Oikawa was nothing less than gorgeous, as he stood in front of Miya. “Miya, huh? Hop in, we’re going right to Moniwa’s and I’m going to sleep.”

Miya yawned as he got in the back, eyes widening in surprise when he catches sight of another man sitting in the driver’s seat. He recognises the boy as Iwaizumi, Oikawa’s boyfriend.

“Hey, Miya,” Iwaizumi says tiredly, starting the car and driving. 

“Iwaizumi, right?” Miya asks like he didn’t already know and he catches sight of Oikawa muffling a snort. 

“Yeah. Oikawa woke me up for this so you better take good care of Moniwa,” Iwaizumi’s voice is nothing less than threatening despite the exhausted tone as he struggled to keep his eyes open. 

“I plan to,” Miya immediately says. “How is he, anyway?”

“He’s good,” Oikawa replies, leaning against the window. “We got home about an hour ago and he went straight to bed mumbling about how he won’t be able to get ready in time to meet you.”

Miya laughed, mouth going dry at the statement. 

“We’re here,” Iwaizumi says, stopping right in front of apartment complex.

“Iwa-chan, wait here, I’ll be right back,” Oikawa says, opening the door to get out, Miya following him.

The duo silently make their way inside and up the elevator to the ninth floor, where a familiar blond man stood in front of a door.

Semi grinned,, his cheeks flushed from the alcohol, “Miya!”

“Hey, man,” Miya leans in, the two of them doing a bro hug that had Oikawa rolling his eyes. 

“Semi, Iwa-chan’s waiting out front. We’ll drop you off,” Oikawa says.

“Gotcha, thanks,” Semi says, eyes blinking slowly.

“We’re leaving now, so take care!” Oikawa says, pulling Semi and walking away with a wave of his hands, a knowing smirk playing on his lips. 

“What’s the code?” Miya yelled, looking at the door helplessly.

“3825!”

Oikawa and Semi go inside the elevator, leaving Miya alone in the hallway. 

That’s when it hit him.

Miya pursed his lips, trying to contain his laughter when he’d realised Moniwa actually took him seriously when he’d said to make 3825 the code because it spelled  _ f-u-c-k  _ when Moniwa wanted to change the password.

He pressed the keys, opening the door and taking in the neat apartment.

He quietly closed the door, toeing off his shoes as he entered, dropping his bag onto the small couch. The apartment practically screamed  _ Moniwa  _ with his crazy obsession with cute small things as his aesthetic.

He walked to the little hallway inside the apartment, mustering up the courage to what seemed like Moniwa’s bedroom.

_ Do it already, _ Miya screamed in his head.

Another voice piped up,  _ Do it! Just do it! _

Miya shook his head and opened the door, face softening when he sees a body on the bed, curled into a fetal position under the covers, the top of his head peeking out.

He stands in front of the bed, softly smiling at the sleeping boy.

He slips in, cradling Moniwa’s head as he placed the boy between his legs, remembering the fact that Moniwa had told him a while back that he sleeping like that.

Moniwa let out a little moan, fingers going to grip Miya’s shirt as he cuddled in even further, making Miya flush.

“Atsumu?” Moniwa croaked, raising his head up, eyes half open.

“Babe, just sleep,” Miya says, kissing Moniwa’s forehead, making the older boy nod sleepily ( _ he’s so cute, fuck me, _ he thinks). “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Sing,” Moniwa mumbles into Miya’s shirt, his small frame swallowed up by the oversized sweater that almost hung off him.

And Miya couldn’t resist, his voice caressing the many lyrics and syllables that Moniwa loved.

**  
**  
  


Moniwa woke up to the sun right in his eyes.

“Jesus fuck,” he groans in pain when he sits up, vision swimming around. 

That’s when he remembers.

Was Miya here last night?

He looks around and sees no one inside his room.

No.

Must’ve been a dream.

He takes his phone from the bedside table and opens up the group chat.

**_9:18 AM_ **

**Miya’s Slut:** I HAD THE WEIRDEST FUCKING DREAM

As expected, the first one to reply is Miya.

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** WHAT

**Miya’s Slut:** I HAD A DREAM YOU WERE HERE AND WE WERE IN MY BED OR SOMETHING AND YOU SANG ME TO SLEEP WTF

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** HSHAHS REALLY YOU’RE SO CUTE I

**Miya’s Slut:** AND NOW IM ??? SO EXCIT E D IM GONNA SEE U

**Miya’s Slut:** also want some breakfast

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** Y E S AAA IM SK RXCITED I’LL SEE U SOON 

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** also can u make breakie now so i can eat as soon as i’m there

**Miya’s Slut:** yEs what do u wanna eat

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** eggs n bacon please love u kaname

**Miya’s Slut:** love u more babe

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** <3

Moniwa just chuckled, trying to ignore the elephant sized heachache he had as he took the water bottle on his bedside table and chugged at least half of it down.

His eyebrows raised when he’d realised he went to sleep without any pants.

Walking out of the room, his eyebrows furrowed when he smelled something being fried.

He walked into the living room hesitantly, nearly dropping the joint when his eyes land on a familiar tall blonde man by the stove.

“Atsumu?” Moniwa breathed out.

The boy turned around, bangs falling across his face as he smirked at Moniwa. “Hey, babe.”

“Why are you here?” Moniwa was stuck to the ground.

“Surprise,” Miya laughs. “It wasn’t a dream, by the way. I really did sing you back to sleep.”

“Oh my god,” Moniwa says, eyes wide in horror.

Miya turned off the stove and walked to Moniwa, using his height to an advantage as he looked at the curly haired boy.

“Not even gonna give me a hug, Kaname?” Miya murmured teasingly.

The name sent a shudder down Moniwa’s spine, his hands shooting out and looping around Miya’s shirt ( _ oh my god, I can feel his muscles, bye, _ he wails mentally) and hugging him tightly.

“I hate you,” Moniwa mumbles into Miya’s chest, smiling when he feels it rumble from Miya laughing.

“Love you too, Kaname.”


	9. serendipity

**_11:56 AM_ **

**Miya’s Slut:** _sent a picture._

**Miya’s Slut:** MY BABY’S HERE FUK C

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** u can thank me for picking him up

**STOP THE GAY:** n me 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** u fucker u did noTHING

**STOP THE GAY:** i’d like 2 say the same to u all u did was call iwaizumi to pick miya up

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** bith c fuckinG COME HERE

**STOP THE GAY:** sorry i’m busy screwing my boyfriend right now

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ok ur literally so disgusting

**STOP THE GAY:** tell me something i don’t know ;)

**pretty babe:** it's way too fucking early in the morning for selena gomez please leave

**savage central:** it’s way too fucking early in the morning for me to deal with your ugly face please leave

**STOP THE GAY:** SHOTS FIRED LMAO

**$ugaDaddy™:** I swear to fuck what’s wrong with you it’s a Saturday morning I want some fucking sleep can’T U LET ME FUCKING SLEEP OH MY FUCKING GOD

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** mum please

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** what will father have to say about this mother

**STOP THE GAY:** i’m calling daddy on you 

**$ugaDaddy™:** oh no i’m so scared  >.<

**$ugaDaddy™:** shut the fuck up and le t me sleep

**bird boi:** this is long overdue i expected you to snap months ago i’m proud of you mum <3

**$ugaDaddy™:** you too stfu

**bird boi:** i take it back i’m calling dad

**bird boi** _added_ **Dedchi** _to the chat._

**Dedchi:** What is this?

**$ugaDaddy™:** Hi Daichi! :)

**$ugaDaddy™:** (IM READY TK FUCKING END YOU KAGEYEMA COM E HERE)

**Dedchi:** … 

**Dedchi:** Suga, I expected better from you! You’re teaching our kids bad language!

**$ugaDaddy™:** Daichi why

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** oh my GOd

**STOP THE GAY:** fuciiNgkil l me i’m sti llalguhimg

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

**savage central:** he means “fucking kill me i’m still laughing”

**Akaashi:** Oh my god

**KenKen:** please get your boyfriend some help 

**savage central:** tru

**STOP THE GAY:** HEY RU DE

**savage central:** you know it baby ;)))

**STOP THE GAY:** ;)))

**Dedchi:** What even is this conversation 

**Dedchi:** Oh Oikawa’s here

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** hi :)

**Dedchi:** Suga told me about you

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** haha what

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** hahaha what are you talking about

**Dedchi:** I mean it was pretty easy to notice the hickies all over his neck you know :)

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** hahahahahahahaha are you blind

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl** _has left the chat._

**Dedchi:** My job here is done

**Dedchi:** Nice seeing you all! :)

**Dedchi** _has left the chat._

**Akaashi:** What the fuck 

**_4:19 PM_ **

**STOP THE GAY:** is anyone from miyagi here today

**savage central:** ^^

**Miya’s Slut:** atsumu n i are @ my house

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** lol blaze

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** _sent a picture._

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** literally 

**STOP THE GAY:** UR SMOKING W/O ME AGAIN RUDE

**STOP THE GAY** _added_ **iwa-chan’s bbygirl** _to the chat._

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** FUCKIJG FINALLY

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** can we crash tho

**Miya’s Slut:** the door’s open ;))) BUT

**Miya’s Slut:** bring ur own food i ain’t making u dinner again 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** BUT YOUR COOKING IS

**STOP THE GAY:** L I T

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** yh kaname cook for us

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** the visual of seeing u cooking while smoking a joint is too much for me fuck that’s domestic i’m s o ded

**STOP THE GAY:** miya that was really gay

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** take a look at ur username then tell me that xoxo

**STOP THE GAY:** ...touché

**Miya’s Slut:** uhffj fine what do you want to eat

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** THAT PASTA THING FOR SINNER PLS

**Miya’s Slut:** ATSUMUFBSHHS

**STOP THE GAY:** SINNER I

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** well i mean that ain’t a lie

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** TRU

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** BUT DINNER PL S

**Miya’s Slut:** ugh fine

**Miya’s Slut:** hoe

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** only for you ;))))

**_6:34 PM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** yahaba

**pretty babe:** ?

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** why is mad dog messaging all of us about you

**pretty babe:** ken? idk lol 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** he told me that you weren't studying so he wants the blackmail pix i have of u

**pretty babe:** OIKAWA NO

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** OIKAWA YES

**$ugaDaddy™:** Yahaba! You should study, you know

**$ugaDaddy™:** Gotta make your parents proud

**pretty babe:** i’m like a hexagon

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** wat

**pretty babe:** cuz all my hecks r gone

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

**  
**  


“What is Yahaba on?” 

Moniwa let out a laugh, finger scrolling past the conversation. Miya raised an arm and sneaked it around Moniwa’s body, bringing the smaller man closer to his side as they got comfortable on the couch. Miya murmured into Moniwa’s temple, making him shudder. “I’m not completely sure, but I need me some of that.”

Moniwa raised an eyebrow, lips quirking as he raised his other hand that was holding a joint and gestured to Miya’s one. “You do realise we are high, right?”

“High on you, that’s what,” Miya mumbled, taking another long drag, making Moniwa gulp at the sight of Miya’s pink lips wrapping around the tip of the joint, smoke floating in the room. His eyes were practically stuck on the smooth expanse of Miya’s neck, his Adam’s apple bobbing slightly. The fact that Miya got extra touchy and flirty when he was high always got Moniwa flustered, despite how they act in the group chat.

Moniwa lifted his head up to look at Miya, but flushed a deep red that crawled all the way up his neck to his face when he’d noticed that Miya was already staring at him.

“Kaname,” Miya says almost throatily, making Moniwa’s heart jump. He wasn’t really aware of their close proximity as they kept leaning even closer to each other. “Babe.”

Moniwa’s breath hitched when Miya’s voice came out rough, husky, the boy getting closer until their foreheads were almost touching. “Atsumu,” Moniwa breathed out, but it came out as a little gasp and  _ holy shit we’re so close is Miya going to kiss me— _

_ Ring! _

They sprang apart, Moniwa nearly falling off the couch when the doorbell rang loudly. 

Moniwa’s heart was beating rapidly as he scrambled to get off the couch, warily eyeing Miya who was just sitting there as shocked as he himself was. Clearing his throat, he saw Miya blush from the corner of his eye and quickly turned around, almost storming to the front door, his hand touching his lips that felt like they were on fire just from the slightest brush of their lips and oh God, Moniwa stop.

He almost slammed the door open, looking at the duo in front. 

“We bought groceries,” Oikawa says, raising the shopping bag he held as he pushed past Moniwa and entered, disappearing into the living room before he heard a loud yell of, “Miya!”

Semi shot him a concerned look as he entered as well, slipping off his shoes and arranging his and Oikawa’s by the door neatly. “You okay?” He asked quietly, raising an eyebrow.

“I’m great,” Moniwa says, giving Semi a fake smile that only made him roll his eyes.

“At least try to sound like you’re okay, Moniwa,” he sighed. “What’s wrong?”

“Uh. Right before you rang the doorbell, I think Miya was going to kiss me? I don’t know,” Moniwa says, hiding his face into his long sleeves, voice coming out muffled.

“Did we cockblock you?” Semi looks kind of horrified that he nearly walked in on the two of them getting nasty. “Oh God. No. Oh lord, no.”

Moniwa just fake smiled again, and pushed Semi into the living room, where Oikawa and Miya were laughing loudly and exchanging stories. “I’m going to cook so you fuckers stay put and if you trash my apartment again, I swear to god—”

“Yes, mum, now go,” Oikawa rolls his eyes, pulling Semi to the couch as well the three of them showed each other funny pictures. However, Miya didn’t seem as enthusiastic now that Moniwa was back inside the room and he nearly stumbled as he ran to the kitchen, tears stinging against his eyes, clinging to his lashes as he placed the groceries on the counter and took out a pot.

He’s stirring the pasta when the first sob wracks his body, biting down on his fist to muffle the cry.

Quickly taking his phone from his pocket, he sent a quick message to Semi.

**Moniwa Kaname:** can you come here

**Semi Eita:** i’ll be right there hold on

He can hear Semi loudly say, “Wait, I’ll just go check if Moniwa needs any help.” Semi appears a few short moments later, brows furrowed as he quickly gathered Moniwa into his arms who pressed his mouth against Semi’s sturdy chest to silence his sobs. 

“Should I cancel tonight’s plans?” Semi asks in concern.

“What’s the use? Miya’s staying here anyway,” Moniwa says, sniffling. “I just don’t know what this means. I’m overreacting, aren’t I?”

Semi just shakes his head, hushing him. “Nah, you’re not. You’re just worried, and that’s okay. Now let’s finish making dinner before Oikawa busts a nut.”

Moniwa burst into a fit of giggles, making Semi smile widely.

He can fix whatever was going on later, but for now, he’s going to enjoy dinner with three of his favourite people in his life.

**  
**  


**_9:34 PM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** MONIWA I LOVE YOU THANKS FOR DINNER

**STOP THE GAY:** HEY I COOKED TOO

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** lol

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i love living in kaname’s house i get the best foot

**bird boi:** best foot

**savage central:** miya i never knew you had a foot fetish

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** OH MY GDHW NO FOOD I MEAN T FOOD

**Miya’s Slut:** it’s ok baby we’re not judging here!!!

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** KANAME WHY

**STOP THE GAY:** _sent a picture._

**STOP THE GAY:** kenji aren’t u proud i actually cooked something without burning a house down

**savage central:** i’m vv proud of my baby

**STOP THE GAY:** !!!!! 

**savage central:** come on over i miss u

**STOP THE GAY:** i’ll be there in ten miss u too

**pretty babe:** why is it that 98% of our convos end w shirabu inviting semi over to fuck

**savage central:** and why is it that u always pop up when ur not invited damn

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** oikawa just choked on water

**bird boi:** iwaizumi-senpai?

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** hey, kageyama

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** oikawa told me to tell you to go suck a dick

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** you didn’t tell me oikawa’s still being an ass

**bird boi:** tell him at least i’ve been getting dick

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** TOB IO FUCKI  GN COME HERE

**bird boi:** oops :)

**KenKen:** lol

**Akaashi:** What the fuck

**Akaashi** _ ’s name has been changed to  _ **What The Fuck** _.  _

**What The Fuck:** What the fuck

 


	10. limerence

**_10:36 PM_ **

**What The Fuck:** _sent a picture._

**What The Fuck:** Koutarou says hi

**KenKen:** MY BABY

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** kenma what the fuck

**What The Fuck:** Tetsurou stop stealing Kenma’s phone

**KenKen:** BUT KEIJI

**STOP THE GAY:** first names????? 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** o h

**STOP THE GAY:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 

**What The Fuck:** AYYYYYY WH A T IS U PMY DUDES!!!!!!

**KenKen:** HSHSHA KOUTAROU WHER E ARE YOU TWO

**What The Fuck:** Kjeii is resudnto kill me im tunnjng for me lic e

**KenKen:** kou wtf

**iwa-chan's bbygirl** : this is such a trainwreck of a gc 

**KenKen:** he said “keiji is ready to kill me i’m running for my life”

**KenKen:** it’s kenma now

**What The Fuck:** Hello, it’s Akaashi again

**KenKen:** you didn’t hurt kou that much did you, keiji?

**What The Fuck:** ...No.

**KenKen:** sigh

**KenKen:** at least he didn’t get the punishment tetsu received?

**KenKen:** _sent a picture._

**What The Fuck:** What the fuck 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** IS THAT KUROO IM PISSINF

**$ugaDaddy™:** Holy shit is that him tied to monkey bars 

**$ugaDaddy™:** Upside down

**$ugaSaddy™:** Kenma oh my god

**bird boi:** hinata looks concerned 

**savage central:** i’m very alarmed 

**STOP THE GAY:** KENJIII CAN WE CALL

**savage central:** eita! sorry!! i’m studying for an exam tomorrow :(

**STOP THE GAY:** are your parents home?

**savage central:** ,,no why

**savage central:** i’m too tired to fuck rn eita

**STOP THE GAY:** dw dw 

**STOP THE GAY:** i’m bringing some of that cheesecake you like! keep the door open for me?

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** everyone needs a semi eita in their life tbh

**savage central:** eita i love you so much

**STOP THE GAY:** yeah yeah i love you too

**STOP THE GAY:** omw now!!  <3

**savage central:** !!  <3

**pretty babe:** that

**pretty babe:** that was actually pretty cute

**savage central:** you know what’s not cute

**savage central:** your face 

**pretty babe:** WOW

__  
  


Moniwa bit back a chuckle, shaking his head as the other setters talked. He was lounging on the couch, a long forgotten movie playing on his television, Miya comfortably sat on the other end— _ Miya.  _

Moniwa almost dropped his phone. 

He’d completely forgotten Miya was even there in the first place. And hell, he’d also completely forgotten about the almost kiss that happened a few hours ago. He wasn’t sure what that meant—or was it was supposed to mean, because there was just  _ no _ way that Miya liked him back—and it pretty much stumped him. How long had they been sitting here together, clearly in the midst of awkward tension? Moniwa wasn't sure what he should do. 

Being awkward around Miya hadn't ever happened before. Not even that one time Miya had called him his boyfriend jokingly. 

This was on a whole new level. 

A beeping sound from his phone caused him to look back at it, huffing out a laugh when he saw a message in the group chat he was in with Sasaya and Kamasaki. 

**KA-MISAMAAA:** boi I’m abt to WHOOP futakuchi’s ASS back home

**monihuehuehue:** u mean u want to just whoop futakuchi’s ass

**KA-MISAMAAA:** I mean,, tru

**SasaYAS BITCH:** what the fuck

**monihuehuehue:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**SasaYAS BITCH:** y’all both got issues

This had Moniwa letting out an audible laugh, making a voice pipe up from next to him.

“What’s so funny?” 

Moniwa shivered when he felt warm breath fanning his face as he discreetly turned to a side, eyes widening when he sees that Miya wasn't on the other end of the couch anymore. He was seated next to Moniwa, a curious look on his face as he leaned in even closer. 

“It’s just—” Moniwa flushes when his voice cracks under Miya’s petulant gaze, scrambling to reply quickly. “Sasaya and I are giving Kamasaki shit for wanting to fuck Futakuchi.”

Miya breathes out a laugh, dropping his head closer to Moniwa’s shoulder, making the boy tense up. Moniwa could feel warmth emanating from Miya’s lean body, his lithe muscles flexing underneath the low cut tank top he was wearing that had Moniwa thickly swallowing, trying to avert his eyes away from Miya’s (heavenly) arms. 

“Kaname?” Miya’s body twists just the slightest, and even though Moniwa’s got his eyes trained on the television that was playing Trance, he could feel Miya’s heavy lidded gaze stuck on him. Moniwa hummed, pulling up his legs to sit Indian style. 

“Kaname.”

Miya’s voice sounded a bit hard, tense and Moniwa turned his head to a side, lips parting in a silent gasp when he sees that Miya is  _ right _ next to face and  _ holy shit, is that his arm pulling me closer? _

Miya’s hand gently tugged him closer until Moniwa was practically straddling Miya, hands balancing himself by touching the couch, Miya’s hands on his hips. Miya doesn’t waste a lot of time before he pulls Moniwa down, biting his lip as he looked Moniwa right in the eye. “Is this okay?” Miya says, his voice strangely loud for a whisper. 

His warm eyes are gazing into Moniwa’s and he can feel a shudder rip through his body but he’s never been so sure of his decision before he whispers back, a pleading look on his face. “Kiss me.”

Miya doesn't waste a second before his lips are on Moniwa’s, his fingers digging into Moniwa’s hips as Miya tilted his head, deepening the kiss even further. Moniwa let out a small whimper, making Miya roughly roll his hips up, causing Moniwa to gasp loudly, the kiss breaking as his head dropped into the crook of Miya’s neck but no, Miya wasn’t done yet apparently, not with the way his hips wouldn’t fucking stop and shit, Moniwa is so, so gone, it’s unreal. 

“Kaname,” Miya murmurs and at the name, Moniwa crushes his lips against Miya’s, open mouthed and tongue, and it’s so hot, it’s so sexy and it’s just downright  _ filthy. _ “Baby.”

They’re doing this clumsily but it feels too good to stop, Moniwa thinks, as he panted out, “Shirt, take off your shirt,” his fingers tugging at Miya’s tank top. 

Miya pulls back for a second, hurriedly pulling it off as he goes back to kissing Moniwa, and it feels so, so good, Moniwa feels lightheaded when Miya’s fingers slowly trail up his thigjs and stop at his stomach, fingering the hem of his loose sweater. Moniwa can't register much except for the feeling of Miya’s lips against his, his fingers dancing across his skin, fire lighting up beneath his touches. 

Miya is pulling at his shirt now, and Moniwa is too late in realising his grave mistake. Miya has his sweater pulled up to his chest. 

Miya halts.

“Kaname,” Miya says, blinking at the binder on his chest. 

_ Fuck. _

How could he have been this  _ stupid? _

“Kaname, are you… are you trans?” Miya says, and Moniwa can’t really make sense of the emotion behind Miya’s voice and  _ fuck, _ Miya was going to be so disgusted with him now and he can feel the tears burning as he scrambles to get out of Miya’s grip. 

He feels so humiliated. 

He falls off, rushing to get up and run to the door, fixing his sweater as he slams the door open, ignoring Miya’s calls and how they slowly, but surely die down as he makes his way to Sasaya and Kamasaki’s apartment. 

He gets there in record time, chest heaving both in exhaustion and the sobs wracking his body and he knocks at the door, knowing Sasaya is a light sleeper. The door is opened a minute later, a sleepy Sasaya looking at Moniwa. His expression turns into one of concern, and then to understanding. He gathers Moniwa in his arms, gently carrying him inside. “He knows?”

“He knows,” Moniwa cries, his fingers tightening against Sasaya’s ratty old shirt. Another voice, deep and familiar, rang out the room. 

“Sasaya? Christ, is that Kaname?” Kamasaki says, worriedly running to them. 

“Can I sleep here for tonight?” Moniwa asks, fatigue seeping into his bones as he tiredly looked at them, sniffling slightly. 

The two of them share a look before silently nodding. “For as long as you need, Moniwa,” Sasaya says, tucking him into his bed. Kamasaki nods, almost gravely. 

__  
  


**_12:05 AM_ **

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** HAS ANYONE SEEN KANAME

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl** : what are u missing ur lover? ;))))

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** IM BEING SERIOUS HERE HE’S NOT HOME OR AT THE PARK OR ANGWHERE IVE BEN TTYIING TO FIND HIM FOR THE PAST HOUR AND A HALF HE RAN OUT

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** WHAT

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** HE’S MISSING??? I’M OMW ILL TRY TO FIND HIM I HAVENT SEEN HIM SINCE I LEFT

**STOP THE GAY:** ??? whAT

**STOP THE GAY:** WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED AFTER WE LEFT CHRIST

**Moniwa's Hoe:** I CANT EXPLAIN FOR NKW INJUST NEE D TO SEEKANAME 

**savage central:** eita, come pick me up we need to go find him

**STOP THE GAY:** come out front i’ll be right there

**$ugaDaddy™:** I just told Daichi, we’re headed to look around 

**bird boi:** i’m coming to karasuno to meet up with you guys

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** if anyone finds him just

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** just emssage me oaju

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** iwaizumi, hanamaki and matsukawa are with me right now we're going around too

**pretty babe:** i’ll ask around too just to be sure

**KenKen:** god, i hope he’s safe

**What The Fuck:** What happened, though

**Moniwa's Hoe:** i don’t knkw fuck i jsut want him home


	11. bombinate

**_3:56 AM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i’m back home now

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** we couldn’t find him anywhere 

**What The Fuck:** I feel sick

**KenKen:** nothing on our end either, tetsu and kou are asking everyone they know

**$ugaDaddy™:** Has anyone contacted Futakuchi?

**bird boi:** i’m with hinata, we’re calling aone right now so we’re asking their team members

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** god okay

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i’ll just head back and see if he’s home yet

**Moniwa's Hoe:** tell me if anything comes up

**bird boi:** yeah

**pretty babe:** ken and i can’t find him at all either it’s like he disappeared off the face of the earth

**savage central:** not right now, yahaba

**pretty babe:** yeah sorry 

**pretty babe:** that was pretty rude of me 

**Moniwa's Hoe:** no no

**Moniwa's Hoe:** thanks though

**STOP THE GAY:** he’s not only your friend, y’know

**STOP THE GAY:** no need to thank us

**savage central:** god i’m worried sick

**STOP THE GAY:** yeah me too

**STOP THE GAY:** but you know moniwa

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** yeah he’d never just disappear without a good reason and even when he does

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** he always comes back and tells us what happened 

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** he’s smart so he’ll be fine

**iwa-chan's bbygirl:** i just know it

**STOP THE GAY:** me too

**savage central:** i think we should all head to sleep then, and wait for him to come back

**$ugaDaddy™:** Me too, go sleep everyone

**$ugaDaddy™:** Kageyama, tell us what happened with Aone

**bird boi:** yup

**_5:23 AM_ **

**bird boi:** we just talked to futakuchi

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** where is kaname

**bird boi:** i’m sorry but

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** futakuchi doesn't know either does he

**bird boi:** yeah 

**bird boi:** he’s gone to meet with the rest of the team

**bird boi:** they think something came up but wouldn't tell me

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** yeah

**Moniwa's Hoe:** thanks

**bird boi:** no problem

**bird boi:** now sleep

**bird boi:** you have a train to catch in less than five hours so remember to pack

**Moniwa's Hoe:** yeah

**bird boi:** don't stay up

**bird boi:** i’ll let you know what happened

**_9:17 AM_ **

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i’m leaving miyagi in about ten minutes, my train’s at 10

**Moniwa's Hoe:** any news?

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** still nothing 

**STOP THE GAY:** i’m calling kamasaki and sasaya they should know where he is

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** okay

**STOP THE GAY:** for whatever happened, don’t blame yourself 

**STOP THE GAY:** i know moniwa and this is probably something he has to deal with, himself 

**STOP THE GAY:** so just wait for him

**STOP THE GAY:** he'll be there before you leave

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i hope so man :/

**STOP THE GAY:** i know so

    »Moniwa’s Hoe: well i sho|

Miya’s finger paused on his keyboard, sentence unfinished when he heard the front door open.  _ Moniwa.  _

It just had to be Moniwa. 

He dropped his phone, standing up from his position on the couch, halting in his steps when a weary, petite boy with bloodshot eyes and wet cheeks enters the living room. Moniwa looks so tired, is the first thing Miya thinks. 

“Kaname,” he breathes out, hurt in his tone when Moniwa flinches just the slightest, fingers clenching onto the sweater he was wearing, like he could somehow hold himself together but no, it was clear that Moniwa couldn’t breathe and Miya couldn’t help himself as he marched over, arms wrapping around Moniwa and tucked him into his chest, face crumpling when he feels Moniwa’s body shake, a wet feeling against his chest, making him realise that Moniwa was crying. 

“Kaname, c’mon,” Miya gently says, feeling like any voice louder than a whisper could break Moniwa. “Babe, look at me.”

Moniwa only leans in even closer, hiding his face into Miya’s chest. 

“Kaname,  _ look _ at me.” Miya can’t help his voice coming out stern, authorative enough to make Moniwa tighten his grip. 

Moniwa flinches again, but slowly backs away, looking right at Miya. Miya feels the air get knocked out of him, knees almost buckling when he sees Moniwa’s doe eyes peering up at him, those beautiful black eyes gazing at him, his lashes clinging because of his tears. His rosy lips are parted, and Miya feels an overwhelming urge to just pick Moniwa up, hold him tightly and speak words of affection and—

Holy shit. 

Miya gulps, taking in the angel standing in front of him. Moniwa looks gorgeous, he thinks, just standing but he seemed to look even better when he’s standing by Miya, standing with Miya, and Miya thinks that Moniwa would look the best while he’s underneath him, rosy cheeks and mussed up hair. 

So who cares if he’s trans?

He’s still the same to me. 

Kind, gorgeous and absolutely perfect. 

Moniwa Kaname is perfect, he thinks, and he’s already in so deep that he couldn’t stop himself.

“Oh, fuck it,” Miya says breathily, making Moniwa’s eyebrows furrow in confusion before they widen in surprise and shock when Miya maneuvers them around, pushing Moniwa against the wall as his right hand went to brace himself against the wall, his left thumbing Moniwa’s hipbone as he pressed his lips against Moniwa’s. 

Moniwa doesn't respond at first, slowly swaying and Miya’s about to pull away, apologise for pushing himself onto Moniwa because hell, he didn’t want to hurt Moniwa anymore, didn’t want Moniwa to hurt anymore, but then Moniwa’s arms come up, his hands looping around Miya’s neck, pulling them even closer to each other. 

Moniwa kisses back even harder, breathing out expletives against Miya’s skin, fingers thrumming, dancing across the back of Miya’s neck until he’s tugging at the hair at his nape, making Miya let out a small growl. Lifting Moniwa’s leg, he pulls himself even closer, pushing against Moniwa, smirking when he sees Moniwa’s head thrown back in pleasure, hitting the wall with a loud thud as he leans down to bite softly against the smooth expanse of Moniwa’s collarbones.

He has no idea how long they stand there against the wall, kissing, hot and heavy until he feels like he’s drowning in the sensation, drowning into Moniwa Kaname,  _ his _ Moniwa Kaname. 

“Bed, take me to the bed right now,” Moniwa lets out a high pitched moan when Miya’s thigh separates his legs and pushes  _ right there, _ right where Moniwa wants it and  _ oh, god, _ he thinks, letting out groans as he slowly rutted against Moniwa’s thigh,  _ I’m so far gone, it’s not even funny.  _

Miya lifts Moniwa up by the thighs, Moniwa wrapping his legs around Miya’s waist as the blonde boy walked to Moniwa’s room, ungraciously dropping him onto the bed, and before they knew it, their clothes were off and everywhere. 

**  
**  


**_2:37 PM_ **

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** sent a picture. 

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i missed the train because this dumb fuck came home

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** o thANK GOD

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** also i didn’t need to see the two of you naked 

**STOP THE GAY:** ARE THO S E HICKIES OR BITE MARKS MIYA

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** …:)

**STOP THE GAY:** M I Y A

**bird boi:** thank fuck

**bird boi:** MY EYES FUCK I WISH THE PHOTO DIDNT LOAD DAM N YOU MIYA

**pretty babe:** good to know you’re safe moniwa! :)

**pretty babe:** disgusting,, lmao

**savage central:** like you??? yh we know

**savage central:** moniwa! thank god i hope you’re okay

**$ugaDaddy™:** Thank fuck Moniwa next time I see you you’re going to get it for worrying me like that

**Miya’s Slut:** atsumu put the goddamn phone down and come sleep

**Miya’s Slut:** also sorry mum i’ll explain later

**Moniwa's Hoe:** okay 

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** bye everyone!! gotta listen to my baby you know ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ 

**STOP THE GAY:** “my baby”

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i’m not even going to ask anymore congratulations fuckers

**Miya’s Slut:** also i have something important

**Miya's Slut:** to talk to you all about

**Miya’s Slut:** but i’ll do it when everyone’s here and not busy

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** let’s do that after your bruises heal

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** :)

**KenKen:** wtf

**What The Fuck:** What the fuck


	12. ethereal

**_4:19 AM_ **

**Miya’s Slut:** HFJS I LOVE JAY PARK AND HIS SUBS

**Miya’s Slut:** “hooks same 1,2,3 i’m tired i’m gonna sleep” S AME DHSH

**$ugaDaddy™:** Don’t forget…

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** GRAY SEXY ENGLISH TIME

**$ugaDaddy™:** Oh my GOD HAHA

**STOP THE GAY:** HSHSHAH FJCIKCIS

**STOP THE GAY:** ICONIC

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** christ fuck

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** also 

**Moniwa’s How:** blaze B)

**Miya’s Slut:** _sent a picture._

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** WHY ARE U ALWAYS GETTI NG HIGH WITHOUT ME

**Miya’s Slut:** ;)

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** is that u asking me to

**Miya’s Slut:** maybe

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i’m calling u

**STOP THE GAY:** why did we agree to get them together again,,

**$ugaDaddy™:** You’re one to talk lmao

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** tru ^

**savage central:** can you fucks go to sleep 

**STOP THE GAY:** _sent a picture._

**savage central:** eita it’s nearly 4:30 in the morning why are you studying 

**STOP THE GAY:** gotta WORK

**savage central:** sleep

**STOP THE GAY:** gotta WORK x2

**savage central:** i’m calling tendou-san

**STOP THE GAY:** goodnight

**savage central:** YEAH that’s right

**STOP THE GAY:** :(

**savage central:** love you

**STOP THE GAY:** :)

**pretty babe:** that was p cute tbh

**savage central:** well guess what

**savage central:** ur NOT

**pretty babe:** i

**bird boi:** _sent a picture._

**$ugaDaddy™:** Hinata’s asleep and drooling on you awww

**bird boi:** _sent a picture._

**$ugaDaddy™:** My kids are so cute 

**What The Fuck:** _sent a picture._

**bird boi:** hi kuroo-san

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** why do you have akaashi’s phone and why are you sending

us pics of u akaashi bokuto and kenma sleeping

**What The Fuck:** Oh I thought we were competing to see whose boyfriend was cuter asleep

**What The Fuck:** None of you fucks can compete w my boyfriends 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** _sent a picture._

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** u were saying? :)

**$ugaDaddy™:** I’m more alarmed with the fact that there are visible red welts on his back Oikawa what have you done to him

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i suddenly can’t read bye goodnight

**pretty babe:** i

**pretty babe:** why are you all like this

**_8:45 AM_ **

**Miya’s Slut:** _sent a picture._

**KenKen:** looks pretty

**KenKen:** where’d you go

**Miya’s Slut:** took the team out for team bonding,, and we’re in this cafe by this park in miyagi

**Miya’s Slut:** the wifi here’s shitty as hell

**Moniwa's Hoe:** o

**STOP THE GAY:** it’s like miya has a sixth sense about when moniwa comes on tbh

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** buT I WANT SEVENTH SENSE

**Miya’s Slut:** O P E N  Y O U R  E Y E S

**STOP THE GAY:** rICE

**Moniwa's Hoe:** ok u fake fan

**STOP THE GAY:** BITCH

**Miya's Slut:** ok but i ate donut corn flakes,, and i thought about what the donut and i had in common

**STOP THE GAY:** why

**Moniwa's Hoe:** ?

**Miya’s Slut:** we have HOLES

**Moniwa's Hoe:** OH MY GOD

**_12:37 PM_ **

**STOP THE GAY:** hello i’m tired and i want to die

**bird boi:** same

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl** : JOIN THE XLUBE

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** C L U B

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** BY E 

**STOP THE GAY:** I’M PISSIN F MYSEL F HSAH

**savage central:** xlube

**Miya’s Slut:** LUBE???

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** LUBE!!!

**KenKen:** xlube

**What The Fuck:** What the fuck

**_2:52 PM_ **

**pretty babe:** so i just binge watched rezero

**pretty babe:** and i can officially say i’m fucking GONE

**savage central:** HO LY SHI T REZERO

**savage central:** THAT SHOW FUCKED ME UP FOR GOOD

**pretty babe:** FUCKIN G SAME

**pretty babe:** I CANT BELIEVE SUBARU MANAGED TO COPE WITH ALL OF IT

**savage central:** I MEAN 

**savage central:** how the FUCJ do u deal with everyone you know DYING AROUND YOU

**savage central:** and noT JUST ONCE BUT SEVERAL FUCKING TIMES

**pretty babe:** I DON TFCKIN KNOW

**pretty babe:** but can i just say that rem is Best Waifu

**savage central:** i HATE EMILIA LMAOOOO

**pretty babe:** yE S FUCKING YES 

**pretty babe:** LIKE

**pretty babe:** SEARCH UP USELESS IN A DICTIONARY AND YOU’LL SEE HER FACE

**savage central:** Y E S OH YM GOD SUBARU HE’S SO FUCKING STUPI D 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** oh my god

**$ugaDaddy™:** Oh my god

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** oh my god

**Miya’s Slut:** oh my god

**savage central:** what

**bird boi:** oh my god

**KenKen:** oh my god

**What The Fuck:** Oh my god

**STOP THE GAY:** oh my god

**pretty babe:** what

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO

**pretty babe:** WHAT

**STOP THE GAY:** KENJI

**savage central:** WHAT OH MY GOD

**STOP THE GAY:** YOU GUYS ARE GETTING ALONG

**savage central:** what :)

**savage central:** haha what :)

**pretty babe:** are you fucking blind haha :)

**STOP THE GAY:** ok whatever u say 

**STOP THE GAY:** but what’s rezero 

**KenKen:** oh my god

**pretty babe:** gud shit

**savage central:** ok so

**savage central:** there this guy

**savage central:** he buying shit @ supermarket

**savage central:** he get out of supermarket

**savage central:** BAM

**savage central:** he in anotha world

**STOP THE GAY:** wHAT

**pretty babe:** ok,,,, tru as heck

**KenKen:** accurate tho

**STOP THE GAY:** and whERE DOES THIS ANIME GO FROM THERE

**savage central:** honestly?

**savage central:** just the same people dying over and over again

**pretty babe:** stop my heart hurts right now that fucker’s still in love with emilia 

**savage central:** whY CAN’T HE JUST LOVE REM DAMN IT SHE’S SO 

**savage central:** SHE’S SO

**pretty babe:** W A I F U

**savage central:** EXACTLY

**STOP THE GAY:** oh my god

**pretty babe:** i get so triggered thinking about betelguise

**savage central:** same 

**What The Fuck:** What the fuck

**_3:27 PM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ok but speaking of rezero

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** am i the only one who ships reinhard/julius/subaru….

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** YES

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** I LOVE THAT SHIP FUCK

**savage central:** YES

**pretty babe:** the tru ship,,,

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** there’s literally no fics for them i cri

**Miya’s Slut:** W R I T E  N O W

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** DO IT 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ON IT

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ok but honestly that ship is so underrated??? like rem/subaru is best but c’mon

**KenKen:** tru

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** knowing that reinhard julius and subaru won’t bone….

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ,,,, cry me a river

**STOP THE GAY:** they will in your fic….

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ...ANYWAY

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** DONT CHANGE THE SUBJECT HAHSHHSA

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** BITCHBEJN

**_5:15 PM_ **

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** _sent a picture._

**STOP THE GAY:** you look dead but like a pretty kind of dead so it ok

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** wtf are u trying to say

**STOP THE GAY:** lau u

**_5:43 PM_ **

**$ugaDaddy™:** Sasuke’s so emo

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** GAARA IS THE ACTUAL EMO OK

**bird boi:** AT LEAST HE’S NOT EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** YOU MEAN LIKE YOU????

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** OHHHHHHHHHHH MY GOD

**Miya’s Slut:** HWEEZINF

**bird boi:** i

**bird boi:** i’m out

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** HA FUCKING SUCK IT TOBIO

**_7:12 PM_ **

**$ugaDaddy™:** no

**$ugaDaddy™:** I can’t

**$ugaDaddy™:** Nnino

**$ugaDaddy™:** no

**STOP THE GAY:** WHAT

**_9:25 PM_ **

**pretty babe:** how do u react when one of your good friends start being Gay about u

**pretty babe:** to U

**pretty babe:** like legit

**savage central:** is this terushima

**pretty babe:** NO WTF

**savage central:** OH

**KenKen:** oh my god

**_11:36 PM_ **

**Miya’s Slut:** my friends call me a crackwhore

**What The Fuck:** What the fuck


	13. illicit

**_11:57 PM_ **

 

**What The Fuck:** I don’t think I can look at Konoha the same again 

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** wat

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** but y

**What The Fuck:** So you know how teams share hotels during nationals right

**bird boi:** sure :)

**$ugaDaddy™:** He’s just salty because we’re stuck in a shitty hotel :)

**bird boi:** it's not a lie

**STOP THE GAY:** ANYW AY AKAASHI KEEP GOING

**What The Fuck:** I feel

**pretty babe:** violated?

**What The Fuck:** Not really but I’ll take it

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ???? what

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i have no idea whats going on

**Miya’s Slut:** im like half ded but im here for the Gossip B)

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** BAB E GO SLEEP WTF

**Miya’s Slut:** but

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** S L E E P

**Miya’s Slut:** i have a feeling im gonna wanna stay for this

**What The Fuck:** Li s ten

**What The Fuck:** So Konoha disappeared after we had our meeting saying he was gonna meet a friend who was staying at the same hotel right

**What The Fuck:** He just came back home and he sat down on the chair and

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** OH NO

**STOP THE GAY:** OH YES

**What The Fuck:** I have never seen him look so pained before

**KenKen:** i cant stpo luahging

**What The Fuck:** He’s having the hardest time sitting still I can see him wincing

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** IM CRYING

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** OH MY GOD KENMA

**KenKen:** this is so fucjinghilkarous i anan die

**Miya’s Slut:** KENMA LOSING IT IS FUNNIER THAN THE ACTUAL STORY 

**savage central:** T B H

**What The Fuck:** OH MY FUCKING GOD HIS SLEEVES CAME UP AN D I CAN SEE FUCKING CUFF MARKS WHAT THR FUCK 

**KenKen:** I WANA KILLMSYSEF

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** HSHAHWHHA

**STOP THE GAY:** KENM A WHAT THE FUCKKD

**pretty babe:** *screenshotted*

**savage central:** i may fight u on everything but good job

**pretty babe:** thanks

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** WAIT AKAASHI MORE IMPORTANTLY

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** YOU SAID THIS KONOHA MET UP WITH A FRIEND RIGHT

**What The Fuck:** Yes

**STOP THE GAY:** IM TSILL RYING

**$ugaDaddy™:** Oh my god Kageyama isn’t breathing

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** CAN I SEE WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE

**What The Fuck:** ?

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** but why do u wanna see konoha

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i have my reasons akaashi just send a pic

**What The Fuck:** _ sent a picture. _

**Miya’s Slut:** ?so

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** IM CRHI

**STOP THE GAY:** WHA T

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** OH MY GOD AKAASHI LISTE N

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** SO ABOUT TWO HOURS AGO IM IN MY ROOM AT THE HOTEL RIGHT 

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** AND I HEAR THIS THUD FROM NEXT DOOR WHERE MY BROTHER OSAMU IS STAYING

**KenKen:** IMFUCING BYE

**What The Fuck:** Oh 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** kenma holy shit

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** I HEARD THIS REALLY LOUD MOAN AND IT WAS OF MY BROTHERS NAME AND I HAVE NEVER FELT MORE DIS GUS TED

**Miya’s Slut:** OHSHIT

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** OBVIOUSLY I COULDNT KEEP PRETENDING LIKE IT WAS OK SO I LEFT THE ROOM TO GO FOR A SWIM AT THE POOL

**Miya’s Slut:** can u send me pics of u 

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** ...go check ur private messages 

**Miya’s Slut:** ...we’re calling tonight i dont care when free your schedule

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** okay babe

**savage central:** how fucking disgusting

**STOP THE GAY:** i thought it was kinda cute

**savage central:** how fucking cute

**pretty babe:** u disguist me

**savage central:** i disguist u huh

**pretty babe:** stfu

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** ANYWAY I COME BACK LIKE AN HOUR LATER AND IM ABT TO ENTER MY ROOM WHEN THIS GUY COMES OUT OF OSAMUS ROOM LOOKING LIKE DEATH 

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i have never seen such a beautiful walk of shame before

**What The Fuck:** Konoha just read everything you said and said “if you’ve seen Osamu you’d relate”

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl** : what does he look like…..

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** _sent a picture._

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** he’s the one w darker hair that me next 2 him

**savage central:** FUCK ME RAW DADDY

**STOP THE GAY:** K E N J I

 

 **KenKen** _left the chat._

 

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** HO HOO OO bOII

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** is he ur twin

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** YE

**bird boi:** okay but im more surprised it was shirabu who said that and not semi or oikawa

**STOP THE GAY:** ….i’m not even gonna fight u on that one

 

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl** _added_ **KenKen** _to the chat._

 

**KenKen:** hi this is kuroo but more importantly can you please tell me why kenma’s crying on the bathroom floor

**What The Fuck:** Leavve him todie

**KenKen:** what thr fuck

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** OK BUT THIS OSAMU GUY IS

**$ugaDaddy™:** I’m wet

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** WHS IM DISGUISTED O G DIE

**STOP THE GAY:** MUM NO 

**bird boi:** WHAT THE FUCK

 

**bird boi** _ left the chat. _

 

 **$ugaDaddy™** _added_ **bird boi** _to the chat._

 

**$ugaDaddy™:** THAT WAS MEANT TO BE A PM TO OIKA WA FUCK

**$ugaDaddy™:** I mean there’s no point hiding it though I’m pretty sure it’s dicks out for Osamu now

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** all of you go die

**Miya’s Slut:** but i mean he is hot atsumu

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** HES MY BROTHER kANAME

**Miya’s Slut:** do u think ur hot

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** OF COURSE I DO BUT WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO W OSAMU

**Miya’s Slut:** …

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** …

**STOP THE GAY:** …

**bird boi:** …

**savage central:** …

**What The Fuck:** …

**KenKen:** …

**pretty babe:** …

**$ugaDaddy™:** …

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** oh

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** hes my identical twin

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** ...oh

**Miya’s Slut:** why am i dating u again

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** can i call you now

**Miya’s Slut:** ?why

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** im about to make you regret saying that :)

**Miya’s Slut:** call me 

**pretty babe:** u guys are terrible

**savage central:** ah yes

**savage central:** what was the word

**savage central:** disguisting

**pretty babe:** DIE

 

**_3:25 AM_ **

 

**Miya’s Slut:** okay but i thought atsumu and i were gonna have phone sex but he actually sang to me and read me poems 

**savage central:** sure jan

**pretty babe:** shirabu ripping off my favourite memes lmao

**savage central:** you’re ripping off of my favourite oxygen

**savage central:** get off the planet

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl** : G E T  L I T

**STOP THE GAY:** HSHHAHAHAH GET REKT

**STOP THE GAY:** kenji i luv u

**savage central:** i know u do

**savage central:** now sleep

**STOP THE GAY:** okay

 

**_5:46 AM_ **

 

**savage central:** yahaba is so edgy these days….:(

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** *cringe

**savage central:** we get it oikawa you understand synonyms

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** bitch

**STOP THE GAY:** lamb had a little mary

**STOP THE GAY:** he also had some vodka

**savage central:** im guessing u also had some vodka eita i told u not to

**savage central:** im going to sleep

**savage central:** eita no drugs please

**Miya’s Slut:** mary was blind

**STOP THE GAY:** did u just assume lamb’s gender

**Miya’s Slut:** no i assumed mary’s age

**STOP THE GAY:** mary isn’t a person

**Miya’s Slut:** i know

**Miya’s Slut:** animals age too

**What The Fuck:** What the fuck

 

**_9:19 AM_ **

 

**STOP THE GAY:** rrrrRrrrrusushian HUMBURUGARE

**iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ok wtf

**Moniwa’s Hoe:** i need some of whatever ur tripping on

**STOP THE GAY:** You don’t know meems. All these kids out with their hamarambes and shit

**pretty babe:** shirabu said NOT to do drugs

**STOP THE GAY:** that’s a lie

**What The Fuck:** What the fuck


	14. petrichor

**_04:20 PM_ **

 

 **STOP THE GAY:** it's 420

 **STOP THE GAY:** presence of mind is required

 **Miya’s Slut:** good morrow sir

 **STOP THE GAY:** eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee macarena

 **Miya’s Slut:** maestro pls

 **STOP THE GAY:** urusse il pene

 **Miya’s Slut:** indian samosas aren’t really good

 **What The Fuck:** W

 **What The Fuck:** T

 **What The Fuck:** F

 **KenKen:** semi are u alright

 

**_01:05 AM_ **

 

 **savage central:** it's 420

 **pretty babe:** it's 1:05 dude are you blind

 

**_03:46 AM_ **

 

 **bird boi:** how did harry potter get down the hill

 **$ugaDaddy™:** ?

 **bird boi:** by walking…..jk, rolling

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** no he fucking flew over the hill

 **bird boi:** no ur fucking stupid

 **bird boi:** (don’t get triggered)

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i don’t get triggered cuz i’m dead inside

 **bird boi:** that’s just a bad situation

 

**_05:28 PM_ **

 

 **savage central:** ahhh im so excited!!!!

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** for what

 **Miya’s Slut:** are you going to that concert…..

 **savage central:** YES I AM

 **savage central:** the vball team’s going 4 sum good ol bonding so we decided to go

 **savage central:** are u going moniwa

 **Miya’s Slut:** HHH I WISH I’M STUCK AT SASAYA’S RIGHT NOW HE’S NOT LETTING ME LEAVE OUR BONDING SESSION W KAMASAKI

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** why dont yall tell futakuchi to go out w kamasaki and then ditch sasaya

 **Miya’s Slut:** . holy shit

 **Miya’s Slut:** i knew there was a reason why i liked u

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** :)

 **pretty babe:** when’s the concert?

 **savage central:** the event’s starting at about 8 so we’ll be there 7:30 ish

 **savage central:** it's gonna be  L I T

 **pretty babe:** yup they’ll burn you

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** HOL Y SHIT

 **savage central:** i

 **pretty babe:** :)

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** HHDHSH

 **Miya’s Slut:** MAJOR CLAPBACK HOLY SHIT

 **$ugaDaddy™:** SHIRABU GET FUCKING REKT

 **savage central:** i,, have no words

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** IM PISSINF

 **bird boi:** yikes

 **KenKen:** #rrrrroasted

 **What The Fuck:** I would’ve said what the fuck but

 **What The Fuck:** I feel strangely proud of you, Yahaba

 

**_08:26 PM_ **

 

 **savage central** _’s name has been changed to_ **that fucking road meme.**

 

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Do I honestly want to ask

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** at this point koushi i don’t even know

 **STOP THE GAY:** you really don’t

 

 

**_11:38 PM_ **

 

 **bird boi:** scotland is in england right

 **What The Fuck:** What the fuck

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Um

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** oh my god tobio-chan

 **KenKen:** scotland isn’t in england….

 **that fucking road meme:** YEAH IT IS TF

 **pretty babe:** scotland is in the uk????

 **that fucking road meme:** wait isn’t england uk tho

 **pretty babe:** oh sweaty

 **pretty babe:** england is a country

 **that fucking road meme:** ….whatever

 **STOP THE GAY:** why are u getting roasted so hardcore

 **that fucking road meme:** probably cuz u rubbed off on me

 **that fucking road meme:** ur a loser after all

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** aAAAANd he’s BACK LADIES N GENTLEMen

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** my longest yeah boi ever is 15 secs

 **Miya’s Slut:** mine’s 25

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** r u frickin lying 2 me

 **Miya’s Slut:** wanna hear it?

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** ok

 **Miya’s Slut:** _[Attached Audio / 0:29]_

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** B OI

 **KenKen:** ha fuckin nerds mine’s 34

 **STOP THE GAY:** ok now ur just lying my record is 20

 **KenKen:** ill fuckin prove u fuckers wrong fuckin watch me

 **KenKen:** _[Attached Audio / 0:37]_

 **What The Fuck:** Kenma I love you

 **KenKen:** love u too

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** im not shook

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** im not even shooketh

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** im fucking SHAKED

 **What The Fuck:** What the fuck

 

**_02:41 AM_ **

 

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Guysssss what are some of your favourite quotes

 **What The Fuck:** “I am Beyoncé, always.” - Michael Scott

 **KenKen:** relatable

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** “get to the chopper, huagh!” - arnold (predator)

 **$ugaDaddy™:** ...What was I thinking asking you guys

 **Miya’s Slut:** all that's coming to my head are lyrics from harambe sry

 **that fucking road meme:** same

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** “pull up ya panty” - young thug

 **bird boi:** isn’t that from panda

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** shh child

 **pretty babe:** “your ego is writing checks your body can't cash” - top gun

 **bird boi:** “do u come with a receipt because i want to return u”

 **that fucking road meme:** oh SHIT

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** DAMN

 **bird boi:** damn to what oikawa-san

 **that fucking road meme:** you are one dense coconut aren't you

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ONLY I CAN MAKE FUN OF TOBIO-CHAN SHUT UR FACE

 **$ugaDaddy™:** BOTH OF U GUYS SHUT UP AND LEAVE MY CHILD ALONE THX

 **STOP THE GAY:** “know that i’m with you always, till the end of time” - harambe

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** “dicks out for harambe” - me

 **that fucking road meme:** i really

 **that fucking road meme:** really don't get harambe jokes

 **that fucking road meme:** or find them funny

 **Miya’s Slut:** @semi ur boy dont even know quality memes smh

 **STOP THE GAY:** was gonna deny it but it's too accurate lol

 **that fucking road meme:** no more sex for u haha bye ;)))))

 **that fucking road meme:** okay but seriously i really don't

 **pretty babe:** it’s okay, you never get most jokes! :)

 **bird boi:** B O I

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** YAHABA OGMD

 **KenKen:** yikes

 **Miya’s Slut:** IM FRIFKF CRING

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** YAHABA IS ON FIRE TONIGHT IMMMM

 **STOP THE GAY:** IM CACKLFIFN HOTL SHIT YAHABA

 **pretty babe:** :)

 **that fucking road meme:** well i do

 **that fucking road meme:** …...eventually

 

**_04:20 AM_ **

 

 **bird boi:** it's 420

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** who cares

 **bird boi:** eveerbodu

 **bird boi:** eveerbodu went on holiday partyparty

 **What The Fuck:** What the fuck

 

**_07:13 AM_ **

 

 **What The Fuck:** Okay so Konoha just got asked out through a DM

 **What The Fuck:** And I can't beluevhis immediate response

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** ??

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** osamu’s interested

 **What The Fuck:** I can't fucing. breyahe

 **KenKen:** iKm fricifjnCruig

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** is kenma gonna pass out laughing again

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Oh my god

 **KenKen:** keiji kusttell them

 **What The Fuck:** Okay so he literaly jsut sendsan audio

 **What The Fuck:** “I HAVE BOIIIIIIII”

 **What The Fuck:** AND KINOHA GOT BLCOED

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** OH MY GOD

 **STOP THE GAY:** ME

 **Miya’s Slut:** atsumu u would do that

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** haha i have ;)))))

 **bird boi:** why am i not surprised

 **KenKen:** ok y’all got a problem kenma’s crying again

 **KenKen:** should i be worried keiji

 **What The Fuck:** oH my fos Tetsu im

 **KenKen:** oh my god

 

**_09:28 AM_ **

 

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i’m lying on my death-sofa cuz death-beds arent cool enough

 **$ugaDaddy™:** You vomited. Get over it.


	15. iridescent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAHA sry i disappeared  
> thought after my exams i'd get more free time but then i got a job and started yoga so my schedule's been pretty tight :// not to mention my writer's block is back (legit i haven't been able to write anything)  
> but enough of that!!!  
> i managed to write this in under an hr so i hope u enjoy it even a teeny tiny bit because i felt dead writing this LOL i tried :)  
> on a happier note, though: HAPPY NEW YEAR! i hope 2018 treats you better than it's treating me at the moment ;((  
> thank u for even reading this far into the note, you guys are the Best.  
> dedicated to aoi for motivating me to write this and my girl Z for inspiring me to (love you, thanks for being stupid with me.)  
> xoxo,  
> e.

**_11:41 PM_ **

 

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** fillin in my uni apps got me like ;(

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Same, I can never write another essay again

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Like damn how do I write about myself and how certain attributes about myself are related to the uni’s beliefs

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** so relatable

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** if i write volleyball one more time i’m going to fuckg fight everyone

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** i’m not that good at encouraging people when i’m on a toilet seat encouraging my asshole to pull its shit together (somewhat literally)

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ok thanks

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** wait that sounded rude that was supposrd to sohnd more genukne wtf

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** i tried ttping

 **Miya’s Slut:** are ur hands frozen because same

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** ya

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** no it's very genuine

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** oh lol okay that’s gold

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** GOOD

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** fuckeifn

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** UFCK THIS

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** i gotchu hotspot

 **bird boi:** what

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** did u jsut call me a hotspot

 **Miya’s Slut:** did u just call him a hotspot

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** yes

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** yes i did

 **pretty babe:** what arw u even doing

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** cuz ur the hottest of all spots ;PP

 **Miya’s Slut:** holy SHIT SMOOTH

 **STOP THE GAY:** dude fuckin write a book

 **that fucking road meme:** title that shit

 **that fucking road meme:** something like uh

 **KenKen:** How To Score Girls Better Than Fuckboys (We’re Looking At You, Kuroo)

 **Miya’s Slut:** HAHA HOLY SHIT

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** i canr believe you made me laugh thinking about KUROO while pooping

 **What The Fuck:** I can’t believe you’re still shitting

 **Miya’s Slut:** dont hatr on my mans hes just got a bad stomach  >:(((

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** TQ babe :*

 **pretty babe:** you both disgust me

 **bird boi:** disguist*

 **pretty babe:** oh shit my bad

 **pretty babe:** you both disguist* me

 **bird boi:** that’s better

 **that fucking road meme:** wtf eita since when were these two gayer than us

 **STOP THE GAY:** it's time to put a stop to this Nonsense

 **STOP THE GAY:** kenji open your window i’m coming

 **that fucking road meme:** agreed

 **that fucking road meme:** wait what

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Are you two fucking again

 **$ugaDaddy™:** Why do you feel the need to update us on this constantly

 **KenKen:** is it safe to have that much sex because i’ve heard people actually died

 **STOP THE GAY:** actually for once i’m not going over just to screw and/or hang out

 **that fucking road meme:** oh are we practicing tonight

 **STOP THE GAY:** ye

 **pretty babe:** practicing what

 **that fucking road meme:** i fuckin LOVE how open shiratorizawa is like….woa

 **STOP THE GAY:** same

 **STOP THE GAY:** there’s this talent show tmrw and all the clubs are versing each other so our team signed the two of us up and we’re gonna dance to downtown by anitta but lele style

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** ok but a concept: shiratorizawa is a very open minded school so for the annual talent show with clubs versing each other semi and shirabu decide to dance to downtown by anitta, lele pons style with shirabu wearing the dress lele wears and semi as juanpa

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** do u agree because Yes I Do

 **Miya’s Slut:** holy shit i’m wet

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** I REALLY LIKE THIS

 **KenKen:** agreed

 **bird boi:** agreed x2

 **that fucking road meme:** ok but but i’m actually wearing the dress how did u know

 **$ugaDaddy™:** WHAT

 **Miya’s Slut:** W H A T

 **STOP THE GAY:** yea he’s going full drag?? our teacher told us to go hard or go home ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** i just came

 **Miya’s Slut:** same

 **that fucking road meme:** listen i’d tell you to shut up and that you’re disgusting but i really do look that good so

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** send pics or it never happened

 **STOP THE GAY:** _sent a picture._

 **STOP THE GAY:** _sent a picture._

 **STOP THE GAY:** and these are the bad ones

 **bird boi:** how do i tell my boyfriend i’m suddenly really into drag

 **Miya’s Slut:** atsumu was on the phone with me and he’s been silent for the last two minutes

 **Miya’s Slut:** wait i think i just heard a sob

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** do you think iwa-chan will appreciate me in drag because shirabu y’all got me WEAK AS HEC

 **pretty babe:** shirabu i know we fight a lot but you look really fucking good and i don’t know how to feel about it

 **What The Fuck:** Sometimes I forget how gay I am and it's times like these when I remember just how much because holy SHIT

 **What The Fuck:** what the FUCK

 **What The Fuck:** WHAT THE F U C K

 **STOP THE GAY:** my new aesthetic is akaashi keiji wtfing himself

 **What The Fuck:** I’m having terror flashbacks to when Kenma dressed up as Jessica Rabbit for Halloween this year and i’m not ok

 **What The Fuck:** _sent a picture._

 **What The Fuck:** like GUYS THIS IS MY BOYFRIEND WOW WHAT A HOTTIE

 **pretty babe:** my new aesthetic is akaashi keiji freaking out over his boyfriends

 **that fucking road meme:** agreed

 

**_01:05 AM_ **

 

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** guys some bird ass shit just fuciin knocked on the toilet window

 **pretty babe:** how are you STILL in the toilet

 **Moniwa’s Hoe:** that’s not the point LISTEN THIS IS TERRIFYING

 **STOP THE GAY:** include this in ur book as a disclaimer

 **that fucking road meme:** or chapter one, if u will

 **KenKen:** “Please refrain from reading this in toilets. You don’t want to have this book open while you’re shitting and some bird knocks on your goddamn window.”

 **iwa-chan’s bbygirl:** wow talk about an icon

 **Miya’s Slut:** death by bird or potential peeping tom killer we will never know

 **bird boi:** rip miya atsumu 2k18

 **$ugaDaddy™:** RIP Miya Atsumu 2k18 indeed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY IM REALLY NOT FUNNY ANYMORE THIS IS JUST THE PRODUCT OF SLEEP DEPRIVATION AND MULPTIPLE CUPS OF COFFEE AFTER TRYING TO FILL APPLICATIONS FOR COLLEGE


End file.
